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A gay man's perspective: Why I'm not buying Lindsay Lohan's miscarriage

Chad Hensley is a full-time journalist, part-time bow tie enthusiast living in New York City. His interests include eating cheese, drinking too many bottles of wine with names he can’t pronounce, and the oxford comma. Follow him at @chad...

Living la vida Lohan

Last night Lindsay Lohan's self-titled reality show came to an unexpected conclusion when the actress admitted she suffered a miscarriage while filming the series.

"No one knows this: I had a miscarriage for those two weeks that I took off," the actress confessed. "I was sick. And mentally that messes with you."

I'm not buying it.

Lohan was infamously difficult during the show's production. At one point producers withheld her payment until she agreed to film more material and at another point Lohan was missing in action for over two weeks. During her halfhearted revelation, Lohan averted eye contact and giggled to herself. What's funny about pregnancy loss?

VIDEO: Lindsay Lohan reveals miscarriage >>

Living la vida Lohan

Over the past decade, the Mean Girls actress has made an art of publicizing her ceaseless cycle of self-destructive behavior and this time the Oprah Winfrey Network's cameras were there to capture it. The show chronicled a potentially sober starlet fighting with her father, flaking on contract commitments, lashing out at her personal assistant and ducking blame for her shoddy state of affairs.

Oprah's response to the drama echoes the rest of the nation's sentiments regarding Lohan's personal brand of narcissistic wallowing. In a candid chat, she told Lindsay to "cut the bulls***."

No one knows whether or not Lohan has maintained sobriety since leaving rehab for the sixth time, but all evidence suggests the contrary. When asked to comment on how she's doing, the star turned volatile. "This is something I don't feel comfortable discussing on camera, and I thought you, as my friend, of all people would tell me in private."

Not many tuned in to view the train wreck unfold, but the few that did can't help but wonder: What the hell is wrong with Lindsay Lohan?

A flailing star

Whether the actress is truly deficient because of lax parenting, brutal Los Angeles experience, a crippling drug addiction or an unhappy goulash of all of the above, one thing is clear: It's killing her. Lohan's biggest problem isn't her dwindling relevancy — it's that her gaze seems to be unreservedly arrested by chaos.

VIDEO: Oprah tells off Lindsay Lohan — Cut the bulls*** >> 

While most rational men and women try to avoid drama, research shows that others have figured out how to trigger the body's stress response simply for the rush. This is why we find Lohan sabotaging what she knows is her last opportunity to rise from the pile of dust and rubble that has absorbed her career.

The series, in which Lohan was pictured chain-smoking and braless for much of, was a huge disappointment in ratings and can be added to her ever-expanding list of professional failures.

They say that there's nothing like a great comeback story, and the fact that we're still talking about the Lohan family after a decade of wasted potential and widespread disappointment proves how badly people want to see her win. However, until she's willing to step out of the limelight to work on breaking her self-destructive behavior patterns, it wouldn't be wise to hold your breath.

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