Dear Mouthy Housewives,
I was driving with my kids the other day when I was cut off by another car. As she drove by, she laid on her horn and flipped me the bird. The worst part is that I recognized her and we were on our way to church!
I feel kind of awkward now. Should I say something to her?
Really Weird Road Rage
Dear Really Weird Road Rage,
Oh, my goodness -- I can't tell you how many times this has happened to me! Except I'm almost always the driver with one fist on the horn and the other hand showing some lame-o in a Prius where they can stick it. Honestly, I know those buckets of bolts can go faster than 35 mph, so why are they always getting in my way? Whyyyy? Ugh. Stupid do-gooders. DON'T THEY KNOW I'M LATE FOR MY EYEBROW WAX?!?
OMG, I think I just had road rage while sitting at my desk. Maybe it's time to cut back on ye olde steroids once and for all.
But in all seriousness, the simple act of driving can turn normally sane people into rampaging maniacs. We've all been there, right? You're late, you're in a bad mood, there's traffic, you can't find a single damn radio station that's not playing Kelly Clarkson's "Stronger" -- it's enough to make you want to (gasp) ride a bike like some sort of health nut. So that's why I think you should cut this lady some slack and chalk it up to her having a bad day.
That said, if she ever does something to bother you, like say, act snotty to you at a party or try to get you to volunteer for School Clean Up Day, you have quite the ace up your sleeve, my friend. Simply smile at her sweetly, compliment her lovely strand of pearls, then quietly say, "By the way, I've been meaning to thank you for teaching my kids what the middle finger gesture means. That day you flipped us off on our way to church was quite educational!"
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