So I was reading this article and just kept thinking “yup!”, “that’s me”, “sure thing”, etc…
Like any job, there are good days and bad days. Some days I love my job. I couldn’t be happier that I get to cuddle up with my kids watch tv, play a board game, or color on a whim…housework be damned. It was not that long ago that I raced through household chores on a Saturday morning just so I could spend most of Saturday and Sunday with my kid without concern. So when this article talked about some “secrets” that mommies keep I was curious. Do others find themselves screaming at the children? Are you hiding in the bathroom with your e-reader just to find enough time to read the last chapter of 50 Shades of Grey without someone snatching the e-reader for a game of Angry Birds?
First secret…be left alone. I’ve taken to locking the bathroom door just for a minute of peace. There is usually a knock or a cry (“mom??? Where are you????”). Sometimes I just need a little personal space. Sometimes I want to read my Nook without some little pair of hands snatching it from me. Sometimes I just want to pee (ok, that happens a lot but I’m 37 weeks pregnant…)
Second secret…Weird breastfeeding stuff. Boy do people judge! You can’t win. You say you are breastfeeding and you have to listen to comments “really??? Formula is so much easier.” Or your mother or mother in law “but I want to feed the baby too”. You give formula and the moms at the park stare at you in disbelief. Doing both??? Pick a side woman!!! You just can’t win. Extended breastfeeding…even my husband was pushing for a finish line with #2. I breastfed her until she was 1 and my husband was not necessarily on board with my plan.
Third secret…Send your kid to school sick day. To that I say – why the heck not --- within reason. Minor fever, complaints of stomach aches, things like that. When I was in first grade I was sent to school by my loving mother despite my complaints. It was walk-a-thon day, fundraising for the school. I had the chicken pox and was forced by the nuns at school and my mother to “walk” around the block – I hope mom enjoyed the quiet day at home! Today, I find myself to be a little more understanding.
Fourth secret…Do over. What would I do over??? Hmmm…well I would still marry the same wonderful man that I did. He truly is a good person, a wonderful friend, and spectacular father. My do over??? I would have started my family sooner. Unlike the women in this article, I would have started having children earlier. Sure we did a little traveling and I got to kick start my career (which I put on pause after #2 arrived). But looking back now I wish we would have kicked this off a little sooner.
Fifth secret…Sleep over Sex. No not sleepover sex. I mean choosing sleep over having sex. Hell ya! SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP!!!
Sixth secret…Technological Distractions. Yeah, I guess so. Here I am typing on my computer while my son is playing Wii and daughter is sleeping. I could be doing something productive in the house…but I don’t want to. I don’t think my kids have ever had close calls because of my need for technology, but if I wasn’t playing on the computer I’d be watching television, cleaning something, or something else semi useful.
Seventh secret…Medicating children. I have done this, per my doctor’s instructions. I was taking two kids (ages 4 & 1.5) on an overseas trip alone! My 4 year old did the trip once when he was 2 and it didn’t go well. To the point that people were bringing him candy, letting me skip in line at our first layover (when you hear a passenger tell the security person “let her go that kid won’t stop crying” you know you’ve made an impression). So my doctor said try benedryl. FYI---it didn’t work. Don’t judge (see #8 below).
Eighth secret…judgy mcjudgerson. I’m sure I am judged every day. And I in turn do it to. It doesn’t bother me when I get judged by those who I don’t know, but when it is a friend it is a little tougher to swallow. My best friend from college lives close by and we are still close. She’s gone a little “natural” for me. She had baby #3 at home with a midwife, I’m having baby #3 via scheduled c-section. Her kids eat healthy and a very particular diet, my kids live on mac n cheese and bologna cheese sandwiches. We couldn’t be more different. It’s only when the comments like “having a natural birth is best” come out does it feel like I’m being judged. It may be best for you, but not for me. After a 24 hour labor with #1, I opted for scheduled c-sections with my others. I don’t think my kids are any worse off for the choice. Who do I judge, well her for one thing…I mean come on, give the kids some sugar (she even limits fruits). Mom’s who spend tons of money on stupid contraptions like baby food steamers, storage units, etc. Why??? Put the carrots in a pot, blend in your margarita maker (I mean blender) and freezer in an ice cube bin. How hard is that?
Ninth secret…Favorite child. I don’t know if I would say I have a favorite. Maybe that comes with time. My kids are so different and sometimes I’m not in the mood for one of them (or the other). My son is a little tougher. His answer to everything is “NO”, he is currently very emotional and cries at the drop of the dime, and is very high energy. When you are super pregnant and exhausted you just want to veg. So I suppose the 2 year girl who likes to cuddle, play board games, and watch movies fits my mood right about now. But I know that will change…when my energy level comes back. But for now, the lad is hanging pretty tight with dad – and the girl has been attached to my hip… I’m just hoping that my girls and I don’t have the contentious high school years that I had with my mom. Those were tough. If it happens, then yes, my favorite will be the boy. I’ll take sitting on the sidelines at his soccer games over dealing with teenage girl drama any day!
Tenth secret…Sorry can’t do it I’ve got the kids! I don’t think I do this. I mean I guess I avoid some things, but I mostly do what I want to do. I do think my sister in law is an expert at this game. She uses her kid all the time to get out of family gatherings. Well she shows up, then quickly disappears due to “naptime” then will come back 5 hours later shortly before “bedtime”. Its kind of annoying mostly because she thinks no one knows what she’s doing.
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