"The Lord is my peace. I shall not live in anxiety. He puts me under his wing of comfort and calms my spirit within me. He takes all my anxieties on Himself and helps me to focus on Him. Yes, though I walk through a time of grave uncertainties and fierce anxieties, I will not fret-for You are my peace. Your Word and Your presence calm me now. You hold my uncertainties in the palm of Your hand. You soothe my anxious mind-You smooth my wrinkled brow. Surely serenity and trust in You shall fill me all the days of my life. And I shall keep my mind stayed on You forever." -- Judy Booth
I love that quote. It says exactly what I am feeling these last few days. So many random thoughts are going through my brain. It is so easy to worry about the details of our lives and much energy is spent worrying about things that we have absolutely no control over, yet, we do.
Things like what to have for dinner, what clothes my son should wear to school, whether to get the oil changed in my car today or tomorrow, those are small details of my life that I can control for the most part. While they are things that add to my day (and as a mom, what to have for dinner is one of my biggest stresses of the day!), they are controllable and do not really affect the outcome of my journey in life. If my son’s socks don’t match, if we have spaghetti one more time for dinner or if I choose to stay home and do laundry rather than get the oil changed tonight really doesn’t matter, we’ll be just fine. That’s not the stress that I’m writing about.
It’s those things that sit in the back of my brain that I spend energy worrying about even though my worrying is not going to change the outcome. As mentioned in my last post, I will be traveling to Illinois at the end of this week to spend time with my mother who has been very sick and just this weekend got out of the hospital. I have that weighing in on the back of my mind as I walk through my days. (Thank you for the many kind responses and encouragement to that last post.)
This week in school they will be testing CJ to see if he qualifies for any special services. I’m all ready trying to think about what we will do if he does or doesn’t quality! I’ve all ready anticipated what this year could be like for him as I think about the amount of time he needs to get his reading done at night, practice his math facts and try to study for a weekly spelling test. Those things in themselves are things that every student does. I’m trying to figure out how to help him do those things with a short term memory issue and a reading disability.
There is potential for change for our family as well as Jim and I pray about the direction that God wants for our family, our kids and us as a couple.
I need to remember to focus my day on the things that I can do and manage. I need to learn to trust the bigger picture to the one Who leads my steps and has a design and purpose for my life and those in my life. My worrying about outcomes will not change the outcome, my trying to picture what’s next will not change what’s next and my creating scenarios in my head of what might be takes my eyes off of the One who knows what will be.
I think today of those words from a familiar hymn, “oh what peace we often forfeit . . . “
Where are you focusing today? Who is carrying your cares today? Where do you find peace?
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