My letter to You

3 years ago

To you baby I never had. when I look back and missing you so dearly, All I can say, I wasn't ready to have you. To hold you in my arms, to be proud of you. 

I was just too ashamed for my deed. and sometimes I miss you so much I switch on the light at night, just maybe my situation have changed. but no. it hasn't.  Im still broke, and still can't provide for you on my own.

I loved you so much I let you go. 

Look , high, high, in the sky, you shine on me, you shine on me and remember you. a star so bright but died. you died because your father wasn't man enough to provide for us both, you died because your mom was a drunkard. you died because we couldn't provide for you.

I miss you. and wishes tonight to hold you. to cuddle you, to clothe you, to bathe you,

to be with you. my little baby. my little bundle you wouldve been 2 years this year. not 1 day passes without thinking about you. Im sober now. and wishes things were different.

we convince ourselves to be parents is by choice. we didn't had a choice. we were broke.

we convince ourselves our nests are empty, but its empty because you don't live there.

oh, little baby, Im sorry, Hope you can forgive me and your dad one day.

miss you,

R. D.

 

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