Meet my mom Melba, her name is being changed to protect me because she has told me in no uncertain terms that her name (and face) is not to be on in internet. Not that I've ever listened to her about anything (according to her!) in my life. I'm a rebellious child, I've always been and I guess I still am. Even though I'm a graying 55 year old lady now.
I don't really understand why I am defiant, maybe because I can be. I'm not sure. My relationship with my mom is nothing like the relationship I have with my daughter. I wish I had that kind of relationship with mom like I do my daughter.
I've always wanted to be a better daughter. To be kind and giving and compassionate like she is, but I don't feel like I can live up to her expectations so I don't try so hard. This is all my perception, and probably based on nothing real.
I'll always love my momma. She's my favorite girl. Remember that song? When I think of her, that song goes through my head.
Now let me tell you about my mom the person. She has been an avid sport fisher for the last 20 or so years, maybe 25 years. She's been top lady angler in the world for marlin and tuna and mahi. She loves the ocean and fishing. But now she can't do it anymore. She is 76 and has advanced osteoarthritis and her rotator in shoulder has degenerated to nothing. That won't keep them from the warm waters of Florida and the Carribean, she just won't be able to reel anything in anymore. I find that kind of sad. But then again I am relieved that she won't be hurting herself anymore.
My mom is the angel that comes whenever there is distress. If someone in the family got ill, she was always there with a pot of soup and a hand holding, or whatever they needed, she gives and gives and gives. I know she's tired now and can't do as much anymore.
She lost her sister last year at christmas time, her only sister, my only aunt. After she passed, my uncle gave my mom all my aunts journals. And my mom read each one. Each word. And in death, with her words, my aunt hurt my mom so much. Even more so than when they'd feud while she was living and they had some doozy fights.
I tried to console her and tell her that Aunties journals were probably written with the thought that no one will ever read these and this is where I get to express myself without hurting anyone. But Auntie left a paper trail.
My mom is kind and generous and beautiful and she's a loving wife to my stepdad. And I will never stop trying to be a better daughter.
Yeah, Mom, I love you :)
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