How Should You React When Your Children Kiss Each Other?

3 years ago

It all started when the girls came downstairs with a guilty-ish look on their pixie faces. I'm praying that they will always carry such transparency in their eyes, but I'm not hopeful.

"What'd you guys do?"

Eden {5} looked at Ellie {7} for a cue, then back at me and simply smiled. Ellie didn't miss a beat and said with a bone straight face, "Nothing."

Nothing my ass, I thought."Don't lie girls. Why do you look like that?" I could tell Eden was going to break before Ellie.

"Well, well, well... Ellie and me... kissed."

Evan, sitting in the corner entrenched in Minecraft, added the sound effects. "EWWWW!"

"Shush." Remain calm. "So, what do you mean she kissed you? That's no big deal."

"We kissed on the lips Mommy. Lots of times."

I looked at Ellie who was sheepishly smirking. I turned my questioning to Ellie. "You mean, like pretending you were boyfriend and girlfriend?" I said, praying I wasn't planting ideas in their heads.

"Yeah," Ellie finally admitted.

"Oh well..." Moment of truth right here..."Just don't kiss other people like that okay?"

The two of them stared at me dumbfounded. Come to think of it, I was a bit surprised by my reaction too.

"You mean, it's no big deal?" Eden said incredulously.

"Nope. Although I wouldn't do it too much. You could catch a virus."

So here's what really happened in my head.

I flipped out a little. Why is Ellie wanting to practice kissing? Is it too much of John Stamos and Full House? She's tarnishing poor little Eden. But then, I thought back to my childhood.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't do pretend makeout sessions with my girlfriends. I did. I would watch TV's or movies, intrigued by the whole romantic "scene." My cousin and I regularly played the boyfriend/girlfriend imagination game, kissing included. We'd even do this mock french kissing gig, careful to not really share saliva.

I'm glad the two of them aren't practicing this on their friends. That'd be an interesting phone call wouldn't it? I think if I had to choose between friends or sisters, I'd choose the latter.

I don't really care if the two of them role-play and pretend kiss. They're sisters. I can think of worse problems.

I've determined that if I make it a big deal at this juncture, it would just fuel the curiosity. The minute something is forbidden, it's more enticing.

That said, I'll have to monitor those two closely. A kiss is one thing. And since Ellie is two years older than Eden, there's a clear imbalance of power. If it continues regularly or escalates, I'm going to have to play the bad cop and rustle through my closet for the nearest roll of duct tape.

Turns out, Eden beat me to it. An hour later, Eden came running into the room holding the tape in her hand. "Mom, since I kissed Ellie, I've been feeling like I have to kiss everything: my pencil, my toys, you! I think you should duct tape my mouth."

I'm not kidding.

Therapy bills are going to drain our retirement fund, I'm sure of it.

I'm going to regret asking this, but what's your policy on your children playing "pretend boyfriend/girlfriend?" Of course, this is assuming they are telling you. Do you have any rules or boundaries?

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