When I told the owner of the yoga studio I go to that today was my last class because I was moving, he asked if I was moving for love. My initial thought was “no” because I was thinking only of romantic love. But when I told him I was moving for family, his response was immediate, “well, that’s love, isn’t it?”
I’ve been asked frequently why we’re moving to Milwaukee and I’ve stumbled over the answer every time. Our decision evolved so quickly and seemed so complicated that it was a question I couldn’t quite answer, even to myself.
It took this morning’s simple exchange to drill things down to their essence (isn’t that what yoga instructors are supposed to do?). I am moving for love. For love of a family who until recently I didn’t realize I missed and who it seems I increasingly need. I’m moving for love of my daughter who needs to know her grandparents, aunts and uncles, and cousins—the crazy, wonderful people who are part of her genetic makeup.
I’m moving for a husband who sees this move as a stepping stone to his dream of living in Europe. Yes, I recognize that most people wouldn’t view a move to the dairy state as a path to European living, but my husband and I don’t always take the obvious path. That said, aren’t Wisconsin and France almost identical? One word: cheese. So that may be where the similarities end. Anyway…
I’m also moving for a love of self—to fulfill a deep need for a quieter life, one that allows me to be more present with the people I love. Of course, it seems ironic to me that the place where I once felt so unhappy with myself may be the place where I can now be at peace with myself, but life is weird.
To make this move, though, requires leaving behind a life I’ve built and still love. It means saying “so long” and “see you soon” (but never “goodbye”) to the other loves of my life: the amazing friends who’ve become my other family. It means giving up a secure job for one with a bit more risk. It means uprooting my child from the only place she’s ever lived. It means spending ridiculous amounts of money and time on moving logistics.
It means believing that the future is worth risking the present.
Why would one do such a thing? There’s only one reason: love.
Thank you, yoga instructor, for making me realize that something I thought was so complicated was actually so very simple.