Cut Out Hate: Why Do We Throw Hate Around So Much?

5 years ago
This article was written by a member of the SheKnows Community. It has not been edited, vetted or reviewed by our editorial staff, and any opinions expressed herein are the writer’s own.

My son says he hates something and I cringe. Granted, he is five and is still learning how to express his feelings.

"I hate my food. I hate this day. Mom, I hate you."

All these things hurt to hear but I know that it's his frustration speaking and his development of language will change how he speaks out about what's in his heart and his head.

Or will it?

I spend hours on social media and watching the news daily. Frankly, we as a society have a huge flaw in saying how we feel. It's as if we are the 5-year-old. We throw hate around like it's candy, feeding to the masses our drama and disgust. For example:

Just recently Gwyneth Paltrow was named Most Beautiful Person in People Magazine... and to date, she's apparently, the most hated.

Why is that?

Why do we need to be so hateful toward her? Her success? Her new movie? Her cookbook that costs a ton to make a meal from? Her products?

Solution: Don't watch her movies. Don't buy her stuff. Turn off the TV when she's on. Seriously.

Get over yourselves and your spiteful mindset.

When did it become okay to say how much we hate things... all the time?

Ridiculous things. Superficial things.

Did we forget that as kids when we heard the word hate that it made us sad? It's a hurtful word. It's a word that bullies use. It's ugly. It's mean.

We've become so quick to judge and hate that we don't think about why we hate so much.

If we need to hate so badly, let's hate the right things.

Let's hate cancer. Let's hate war. Hate that there are dying animals in shelters. Hate homelessness and hunger. Hate children killing other children. Maybe, for a change, learn about what fuels our hate. Talk about it. Act about it. Standing by and hating doesn't fix something. Wanting to change something will.

We should be helping our children understand the word hate and how to use it sparingly. To be the solution. To be the reason something is a eradicated like the word retard, another example of a word that should no longer be around.

Talking with passion doesn't excuse you either. Maybe try "dislike," "not a fan," and if you need to be so bold, "despise."

Need to be more passionate? Let loose the curse words and other expressive terms but make sure my son is not within earshot.

Instead of hating, you can teach, inform, explain, be a role model and not a hater.

I'm ready to cut out hate

Are you?