Our faith will not only shine through, but be strengthened when we express it through our love. I apply this to my step-mothering.
Step 1: I pray and ask God to help me love my children as He loves them. Sometimes it’s not easy to give love when it’s answered with rejection. But I believe in the Gospel and God’s commandment to love, so this is another opportunity for me to express my faith. I may oftentimes be rejected, and it hurts, buy my Lord and Savior was also rejected; in fact, he was despised and rejected. If he experienced that for me, I can surely show my faith and love for Him amid the turmoil.
Step 2: I empty out my vessel each day so that God CAN FILL IT and use me in this capacity.
Step 3: Once I have committed myself to expressing my faith through love, I try to find a way to show my love. Even if it’s just one thing for the day because that’s as hard as I can push into that wall that faces me, I think to myself: “What can I do a little differently to show my stepchildren that they mean something to me, that I love them?” Today, I made my stepdaughter her favorite breakfast, one she knows was made especially with her in mind, and then I squeezed her a little tighter than usual before she left for school. She actually stayed still and let me. She even chuckled.
Small steps, some days rejected, some days simply tolerated, and some days giddily accepted, slowly but surely chip away at the wall put up, the wall you are facing daily and trying to break through daily.
You may find yourself surrounded by many walls . . . walls between you and your stepchildren’s mother, walls between you and your stepchildren, and even walls that may be creeping up in your marriage as a result of the other walls. Sometimes, these walls even attempt to build themselves up between you and your Savior.
Step-mothering works, and then it fails. It’s like an erratic heartbeat. It will always be a sensitive situation because so many factors contribute to the situation. As for me, to express my faith through love, I will pursue each individual relationship involved in my imperfect but beautifully blended family to the best of my ability and above all, I will guard my relationship with Jesus Christ because He is the ONLY one who will hold me up and will not waiver. That is his GRACE expressed to me through HIS love.
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