Dear Mouthy Housewives,
I was recently annoyed by the whole idea of the smash cake, and found some validation on your blog. Now I'm prompted to ask if you've heard the term "push present." Yuck! While I think that giving your wife a gift on the birth of a child is a lovely thing, I find the term "push present" to be very off-putting. It doesn't help that I was introduced to both of these terms by my adorable and beloved sister-in-law... but this stuff drives me nuts.
What do you think? And can I be vocal about this or should I keep it to myself?
Push Present Police
I only quite recently heard about this "Push Present" nonsense, and even now I'm in denial that people use the term seriously. I find it to be offensive for two specific reasons.
1. It makes me think of potty humor. (Yes, poop. Gross.)
2. The term suggests that giving birth to a child is something that warrants a juvenile form of celebration. "Aw, you made your bed, young lady! Here's a lollipop!" "Aw, you birthed a human being, frail female! Here's a Coach bag!" It's ridiculous and it does nothing to curb the stereotype that women are materialistic creatures who run through life chasing that diamond-tipped carrot at the end of a stick.
So. That's what I think about the Push Present. As for whether you should vocalize my manifesto and perhaps print out copies for the next PTA bake sale? That's going to depend upon the audience. Take your sister-in-law, for example. She may not feel the anger of an oppressed gender swell within her when she hears the term "Push Present" like you or I may, and so an eye-roll or critical comment may hurt her feelings. (You know women and their emotions! Especially the pregnant ones!) I don't think you need to bite your tongue, but you may better invest your time preventing your friends and family from marrying those who believe in the purchase, naming, and exchange of the Push Present.
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