Often, people are curious and ask me what it’s really like to be a mom. This is such a tricky question to answer without saying something offensive, cliché or both. In my experience parents feel compelled to lie about the full spectrum of having children. In this post, I will attempt to answer the question truthfully, from my perspective.
I think raising children is often more challenging than people anticipate, it’s hard work from the very beginning. A healthy pregnancy, labour, sleepless nights, incessant crying (both you and baby), breast feeding and tantrums are a few of the many challenges you can expect. You will suddenly be forced to be less selfish and put this new little person completely ahead of yourself. As you attempt to compromise on different parenting techniques and find ways to spend quality time with your partner, there may also be a strain on your relationship. This can be an incredibly difficult adjustment. But truthfully, I have found the hardest thing to be, please excuse the catch phrase, “Keeping up with the Jones’s”. You don’t think you’ll ever fall into this trap as a parent but every once and a while, you do. I’m not sure if parenthood is getting harder with each generation, but there are days when all the new progressive approaches to raising children can sometimes exhaust the very essence of being a parent. Word of advice: Perfectionism and parenting do not go hand in hand. That said, if you choose to have children, you owe it to your child, your family and society to make the appropriate life long sacrifices. Therefore, if you take the plunge, you should be prepared for all of the above.
Moving right along to the good stuff:
-The endless giggles and laughter! I promise you, if you let them out, no matter what the circumstances, the giggles can appease anything.
-You get to experience the world all over again by watching them experience life’s little firsts. I think that alone is the reason people call the experience “magic”.
-You are given the opportunity to influence the way another human being sees the world as well as live vicariously through them. Of course, it is important to remember that genetics play a huge role and you work with the child that you get.
-You get to hang out with the most authentic little person of all time. This may have a shelf life, but you get to witness it none the less.
-You get to embellish the truth, make up stories or even lie on a daily basis! For example: When Dryden says he doesn’t want to wear his shoes (we call them his Jordan’s) I tell him they are magic and will make him jump higher. Works every time! Dryden has somehow convinced himself that the wild things in his book live in our house. He truly believes I shrink them and put them outside before bed. Straight up lie: I tell him, “There are no cookies left in the box.”
-The hard times may be like nothing you’ve ever experienced, but please be reassured, the good times ARE like nothing you’ve ever experienced.
-Lastly, there is nothing greater than the pure love and excitement a child experiences upon seeing you after you’ve been away. It’s how you always expected everyone should see you, like the superhuman that you are.
I’m not gonna lie, getting lost in the fog is easy on this journey. The only advice I can offer is to continually remind yourself that no one is of higher value than you. Remember to make time for you and I assure you everything else will fall into place.
Domestic Goddess In Training
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