3 years ago

I got up.
I found more unbelievable things.  Things I never imagined could be happening.
From a person that I loved….for 15 years.
From a person I trusted….for 15 years.
From a person I wanted children with….forever.

I got the kids ready for school.  Laughed, smiled, kissed them.

Then?  I got them to school.  Then?

I bawled for 30 minutes.

Every.  Single.  Day.  A new betrayal.  A new thing that just hits me in the face.  And?  I’m not sure it will ever end.

The deep darkness that has been done…while we had children.  While my children were growing up.  While he “cared” for my kids — he was deep into something.  Hiding.  Lying.

Not the “big” thing that he announced.  No, not that part.  That’s workable.  That’s a shocker, but not a “Michelle breaker”.

The rest?  That comes out.  That I’ve found.  That I’ve  tracked.  That I’ve understood.   The foul side.

Too much….even for a hardened Ginger to bear.  The depth of the deceit and betrayal of my love and trust.  Of my boys.

I’m not sure how I’ll climb over this hill, but I will.  I always do.  Why?  Because apparently we know why he never did even try.

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