Take Control of Your Dating Life With Singled Out App

3 years ago
This article was written by a member of the SheKnows Community. It has not been edited, vetted or reviewed by our editorial staff, and any opinions expressed herein are the writer’s own.

Let me paint a picture for you. You finally decide to sign up for that internet dating site at the behest of your friends and family. Or maybe you did it in spite of their misgivings. In any case you did it. You uploaded your best selfies. You cropped your friends out of that photo of you in your favorite outfit. You wrote a pithy about me section so your potential suitors know that you’re funny and smart. You answered all the questions and you clicked all the boxes. You click “save” and your profile is now live. It’s only a matter of time that someone who fits your criteria sees your profile and perhaps sends you a message.

Wrong.

It turns out men and women look at internet dating differently. Now one may say “Of course. He’s a man, she’s a woman…different socialization blah blah blah.” There’s no arguing that, but what if the differences caused one side to interact with an app or website one way while the other side interacted with it in a completely different way? And what if those differences made it harder for one side to find someone they want?

You’re on your dating app. You’re swiping left. You’re swiping right.  You’re being discerning because you don’t want to waste anyone’s time and don’t want your time wasted. It turns out other people are swiping right. ON EVERYONE. How would that make you feel? Here you are making conscious decisions and your potential match is throwing darts at a board. That’s not going to make a lot people feel good. There’s nothing wrong with casting a wide net, but with internet dating there are so many avenues to break down what you want and don’t want that to have someone just bypass it is a serious cause of frustration.

I was on social media when a woman, who explicitly stated she wanted a serious relationship on her profile, retold a story of a man getting upset at her for rejecting him because his profile said he was looking for casual dating. When he was presented with this fact as the cause of his rejection, he told her not pay attention to his casual dating designation because he was trying to meet women as many women as possible and see where it goes. Now going with the flow isn’t necessarily a problem, but everyone doesn’t want to. That’s why these sites have all these boxes to click so you can narrow down who you can interact with you. But if one ignores them, what’s the point?

Singled Out App is here to change that. Taking a page from the hot or not model of other dating apps Singled Out App is giving control back to women allowing them to choose who they want to interact with based on how potential suitors answer a series of questions. The suitor will see a photo, but instead of swiping affirmatively, thus giving him a higher chance to be matched with her (compatibility be damned), he’ll be answering a question. If he answers in the way that she likes he’ll be put in a pool of potential matches who can answer more questions. Those who don’t answer as she hoped will be eliminated. The match can opt for a second chance if he’s eliminated, but it’s still up to the questioner.

By doing a dating app this way a person can’t just be matched with someone based on looks alone because the specifics of who they are can’t be ignored like they can be on other apps. If you have a dealbreaker as simple as wanting someone who’s a non-smoker, people who answer yes to the question “Do you smoke?” get eliminated. There’s no compromising on a dealbreaker with Singled Out App because you don’t have to. You have a pool of men to choose from who answered your questions the way you like. And giving a second chance to someone who didn’t is still up to you.

By taking a bit of that frustration out of trying to find someone to hang out with or date long-term, Singled Out App gives you chance to make looking that someone fun again. You’re not wasting your time sifting through matches that aren’t really matches. Your matches are people who fit what you want. Because while looks can be important, in the end compatibility matters. A relationship can’t flourish if the people who are in it aren’t on the same page. It also can’t flourish if an internet match ignores everything that’s on your profile page.    

Singled Out App will be available soon on Itunes and the App Store. .

Shanta Fabulous is an Oklahoma City based beauty blogger who also loves video games, The New York Knicks, and Harry Potter. You can read her blog "Bury Me In Red Lipstick", here.

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