Slow Pussy Sucking

3 years ago

Originally posted on a blog I curate www.OrgasmDaily.com, written by Yia Vang

I love having my pussy sucked. That wasn’t always the case. It used to be that pussy sucking was awkward, and high-pressured; something I did to prepare for penetration like it’s step 4 of having sex. That experience where I felt like I had to moan loud to please my partner even if he’s using too much pressure or he’s fingering me before I’m really turned on. And then there’s that moment where there’s no more to give but I can’t tell him to stop because he really is trying really hard, so I have to clench my hips and move them to try and get him on that spot so that I can go over and show him what a good lover he is. And of course the louder I moan, the harder and faster he went, and the more I have to clench in pain. Yea, pussy sucking was hard work!

Slow sex was a foreign concept to me. I always thought it was supposed to be hard and fast and get to the climax. If there was no climax, then there must be something wrong with me. Until a few years ago when I met a lover who knew how to slow down and tune into my body. It completed changed the way I viewed pussy sucking and it changed my relationship to my body. He took his time, he slowed down, he teased, and he built the wanting. If there was no climax it didn’t matter because my body felt nourished and deeply saturated, and when I did climax it was in waves that rocked my whole body in pleasure for a long time.

When Nicole Daedone’s book Slow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasm came out with a full chapter on slow sex and pussy sucking, I just about fell to my knees and prasied god almighty that a woman wrote about the kind of sex that my body was craving for. I didn’t have the language to describe it and here she’s captured it and put it out for the world to read. I’ve included an abbreviated expert from the book on pussy sucking.

Women naturally desire sex that is connected, earthy, sensual, and artistic. They want permission to be turned on. The rules are simple:

1. GO SLOW: slower than you could ever imagine. Slow so you can feel her, smell her, taste her every cell.

2. BE UNPREDICTABLE: her orgasm responds to the elements of surprise. Just let yourself feel, don’t think too much. Follow your own sensation and where it wants to take you. Desire co-arises, so whatever feels best to you will be the most sensational for her too.

3. LEARN TO HOLD: Once you’ve gotten her to a place of intense sensation, don’t move.
Hold there as long as possible so she can absorb all the pleasure that’s available.

MAKE THESE GUIDELINES YOUR ONLY TECHNIQUE
Let your desire be your compass. Connect to your senses and let them guide you. You’ve honed your skills through OM; there’s nothing to do except trust. The orgasm is there.

Exercise. SLOW ORAL FOR HER

Part ONE: Preparation

Consider OMing first. After being stroked a woman’s body will be fat with orgasm.
If you choose to begin this way SAFEPORT her first. Tell her you intend to stroke her and you will not give her grounding strokes at the end like you usually do. Instead leave her high and full and ready. Draw her out physically and with your words.

Part TWO: Coaxing Her Orgasm into Bloom

Help your woman take her clothes off. Go slowly. Linger. Show care with every button, every hook, every zipper.
Lay her down on the bed and begin with her feet.
Press your thumbs into her arches until you feel her let go and relax.
Ask her to communicate sensations to you. Ask her to tell you what it feels like in her body. Keep drawing out her sensation until you feel that she is truly ready to begin.
Treat her whole body as a sex organ and put as much attention on her neck, her chest, her nipples, her stomach. Don’t just go straight for her pussy. Spend some time teasing and coaxing her body to open and surrender to your touch and confidence.
Firmly and gently place a hand on each knee and press her legs open.
Feel the heat increase between you. If she moves, tell her to be still.

Part THREE: Drawing out her Orgasm

With one soft finger, gently skim along her inner labia. Add lubrication if that would feel good. Feel how soft her labia are, like tissue paper. Feel how, when you stroke very lightly, you can almost feel the ridges of your own fingerprints.
Bring your finger to rest just below her clit but without touching it. Ask her to tell you a secret. Tell her you won’t budge your finger until she tells you something confidential. As she starts talking slowly move your finger closer to her clit getting as close as you can without actually reaching it.
Draw out her desire with soft kisses, firm intention, and gentle pressure on her inner thighs. Ask her to tell you how her pussy feels. Tell her a sensation in exchange, be specific.
Lick the outer rim of her labia on both sides. Lick just enough to feel the blood pumping in your lips. Then slowly, starting at her introitus, draw your tongue up the centerline of her pussy.
After a few gentle strokes take the whole of her clit into your mouth. Draw it in. Move your tongue along the bottom ridge of her clit, where the inner labia begin to separate. Up and down in the ridge, as gently as you can. Pause and feel how her clit extends itself father into your mouth.
Now take the whole of your mouth and engulf her clit. Move the soft inside of your lips around her hood while keeping the center of your lips wrapped around her clit. Make your mouth big and soft. Try pulling back and exhaling heat onto her clit before diving in and sucking some more.

Part FOUR: Going Deeper

Curve your tongue and insert it into the pocket that forms under her hood, just above her clit. There is a spot somewhere along the top ridge of the clit where you can feel a slight electrical current, like when you rub your tongue over a copper wire. Keep moving your tongue over that spot. Fuck her there, digging deeply as if you were burrowing inside her. The more attention you give the more the spot expands until its pulsing under your tongue. Once it’s pulsing you know she’s open. Wrap your mouth around the whole of her hood as you move your tongue around this spot, just above the clit.
While you are sucking her, take two fingers and slide them inside of her reaching up to the spot that would be the back of her clit. Rest your fingers there. Don’t move, just press very gently. Notice how the pressure pushes her clit from behind, how it pops forward into your mouth. Suck it as if you were sucking all the juices out of it. Feel the flow all the way down to your cock.
Begin to move your tongue in a slow rhythm that she can catch on to. If it starts to feel tight or tense, pull back and breath. Exhale.
Ask her if she desires a climax, if she wants you to suck her until she comes. If she says yes, tell her you will be drawing her over rather than pressing her over. Gently ask her to communicate if she would like you to move faster or apply more pressure.
Continue to push her clit slightly from behind, while sucking and moving your tongue over her. You do not need to add speed or pressure unless she asks for it. Keep sucking, but pull your tongue back on top of her clit so she can lock into you. You can create a beautiful arc where you hold her in total stillness as she comes.

If or as she goes over stay present and connected, do not try to make anything happen.
Simply magnetize her orgasm towards you. As you release the sucking, feel her body go into familiar contractions. The longer you stay in the stillness the more powerful the contractions will be.

As the contractions slow, move back slowly so that you can apply pressure anywhere on her body. Heavy pressure feels very good and grounding after she’s climax. Put pressure on her thighs, her legs, her chest. When you feel her relax, stretch out and lie on top of her until you can feel every part of her body exhale. Do not worry if she begins to cry. Wrap your arms around her so she knows you are still there.
Then, tell her a secret.

This is an article written by a member of the SheKnows Community. The SheKnows editorial team has not edited, vetted or endorsed the content of this post. Want to join our amazing community and share your own story? Sign up here.
comments

More from love

Love
by Summer Heacock | 11 hours ago
Love
by HelloFlo | 6 days ago
Love
by HelloFlo | 12 days ago
Love
by Jennifer Benjamin | 12 days ago
Love
by Sara Lindberg | 13 days ago
Love
by Ambreia Meadows-Fernandez | 15 days ago