She's Just Not That Into You!

8 years ago

Two text messages, four emails, and one phone call in the past 9 days.  And I have ignored them all.  If you were the guy making these attempts at contact, how many times would you need to be blown off before you finally realized I'm not interested in you?!

Such is my current dating dilemma.  I have never been out with such a clueless guy in my life.  The date from hell occurred last week.  In a nutshell: he talked way too much - sometimes with his mouth full of food; interrupted me when I actually could get a word in; and drug out the date way too long after I announced I wasn't feeling well (I literally had some kind of eye-burning allergic reaction to the guy, for which he insisted I take his Lactaid).  It even got to the point where I sat turned away from him as he blabbed on and on about who knows what, with my arms crossed and the most bored expression on my face.  Anyone could have seen I wanted out of there - anyone but him, apparently.  Even when I announced that we should get the check, and I just needed to go home and go to bed, he still took his time savoring the complimentary dessert that the slow(!) waiter brought to our table.  He still suggested that we go get coffee somewhere afterward.  And I thought I'd never get rid of him as he insisted on walking me to my train, even though it was out of his way, and proposed that he ride with me to a certain stop - a suggestion I stopped cold by fibbing about which line I was taking.  Twice I had to duck an incoming good-night kiss by fending it off with a friendly hug - though the second attempt ended in a wet one on my cheek.  Eeeeiichhhh.

Call me cold, but this guy has gone too far.  He needs a reality check.  A wake-up call.  And the single women of New York could use the favor.  His inattentiveness during the date and cluelessness afterward signal the greater potential issue of generally being inconsiderate to my thoughts, feelings and needs if I were to continue seeing him.  And who wants that?

So here I am, putting off what I know inevitably needs to be done - that which I have never had to do in my 17 years of dating: make a phone call spelling out to him that it's Just. Not. Happening.  I am not going with you to Chinese New Year's festivities, nor will I be your date to your niece's wedding in April, despite the fact that you somehow have it in your head that I agreed to go.  I am not making the hour-plus trek to your apartment so you can update my ipod and we can watch movies that you pirated, computer geek that you are.  But might I suggest you download a certain movie to get a clue?

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