Night Time is the Wrong Time

7 years ago
This article was written by a member of the SheKnows Community. It has not been edited, vetted or reviewed by our editorial staff, and any opinions expressed herein are the writer’s own.

Check out for more!

Happy Friday y’all! First, can I just say when I was looking for a picture of “lonely Black woman” it kept giving me photos of Black women at church?!!? That made me laugh and cry all at the same time.

Now on to the point of this post.The other night I decided to keep my Ipod on and let the music put me to sleep. Just as I was drifting off, Bobby Womack’s, If You Think You’re Lonely Now. And I was like awwww damn! This is not the song you want to try and fall asleep to because now I feel all sad and lonely. So, I promptly rolled over and posted this update on the Book:

One should not listen to if you think you’re lonely now right before bed. Could go several ways. Flipping through your contacts. Skeletons coming out the closet and chasing you all around the room. Or crying into pillows.

Time out. When I lived in Atlanta I was rolling around with my cousin (his father and my mother are siblings). So, his mother’s family has rarely been, well let’s just say on the right side of the law. So, we go to visit his cousin. A true ATLien. Nah mean? And he was with this chick who kind of, no make that really, looked like a man. So much so that it’s how we all referred her. Like we would literally ask my cousin what was up with his cousin and that man/woman he was dating. She was real cool though. Real ride or die. So, we’re sitting around their apartment and man/woman had a record player. And she/he put on ‘If You Think You’re Lonely Now’ and was like “ohhhh this is my shyt!” And then she kept playing it! Now, sure we all have a song that moves us so much so that we keep on repeat. In the privacy of our living rooms, cars, or earphones of course. But what you don’t do, no matter how good the song is, is play the same song over and over in front of company. You just don’t do it! Sorry. Had to share.

Time in. So technically this song is about a man whose woman has been nagging him and he’s like, “oh really? That’s how you wanna play me?! Well then I’m out! And if you think you’re lonely now….”  Well you know the rest.

But I think, just in general, this song is horrible, just horrible for a single gal. Don’t believe me? Well as pastors like to holla, “can I exegete the text?”  Or plain and simply, can I break it down for y’all?!!?

Whilst going in and out of sleep, these lyrics literally hollered at me, thus making me feel, wellllllllll…all alone and lonely.

  • I wanna dedicate this song to the lovers of the world tonight. And I expect that might be the whole world, ’cause everybody needs somebody or something to love.Yes. We all do need somebody to love. I have no one to love or loving me right now, so thanks. Thanks for that cruel, cruel reminder.
  • When it’s cold outside, who are you holding?Dammit! Nobody! And it’s warm outside right now! And still nobody!
  • If you think you’re lonely now, huh, Wait until tonight, girl.This is the first time you hear this. It doesn’t sound so bad. You get a lil’ indignant. Like yeah. I’m alone. But I ain’t lonely! I ain’t lonely! 
  • When the skeletons come out of your closet, And they chase you all around the room, And the memories sail on like a ghost, And mess you around with a sad long tune.- What?!?! Seriously?!!? I’m already depressed! And you wanna bring dead things aka skeletons into the equation! And they’re not just chilling in my room, nope. No! They’re chasing me around. Memories floating above my head dressed up like a ghost with a white sheet and two holes cut out, (mmmm that could also be the KKK, maybe they are white supremacists ghosts who want to make sure I don’t date/marry a white man in the midst of my single Black woman crisis) just taunting me. And who can I call?
  • Ahhhhh. If you think you’re lonely now, aww, wait until tonight, girl. - Sir. Please stop. You already said that once already. And is it just me or is your voice getting louder? Are you in the bedroom with me? No. Can’t be. Cause I’m alone.
  • But when love walks out and the pain walks in, You weep and still you wanna say…- Wow. Just dig that knife in a little deeper. Skeletons have chased me around my bed. But that’s not enough? Now I’m weeping. Not tearing up. Or crying. But actually weeping?!?
  • If you think you’re lonely now – Seriously, sir. You’ve already said that.
  • Lord, help me.Lord, help you?!?! No! Lord help me! I’m the one who’s stuck in this dark bedroom, weeping, and simultaneously being chased my skeletons. And! And! Apparently this is how my life is gon’ be, cause see, Black women don’t get married. At all. So, Lord help me! Help me make it to tomorrow! And to the altar! Or at least lose this cat allergy I have. Lord, JE-SUS!
  • You see, tonight’s the night for when your needs come out, When your needs come out to breathe.Yes! Yes! I am a woman with some needs! You got that one right! I needs someone to come rescue me from the nightmares I’m sure to have about creatures in my room. I needs someone to take out the trash. And paint my living room. I needs someone to caulk the cracks in these walls. Mmmm… I needs someone to rub these feets. And maybe take me on a vacation. Or were you talmbout some other needs, sir?
  • And you toss and turn and there ain’t no way you can sleep.Well I mean how can I? There’s weeping? There’s chasing. There’s just taunts of all my mistakes, things I coulda, shoulda, woulda done, to keep that man and have him laying here beside me. Then I wouldn’t be in this mess! Curse me for being all independent and wanting to have the best for me and stuff! Now I can’t sleep.
  • If you think you’re lonely now – I really need you to stop saying that. Oh no, you’re not? You’re just going to keep repeating it for the next 3 minutes? Ok, fine. Cool. No. You keep singing. And doing riffs about my loneliness. Oooo oooo. Ahhhh ahhhh. My loneliness sounds so good when you holler about it with gruffness and toughness. I don’t want to stay in bed for weeks. Nope. Not at all. I’m not going to go out with the first dude who asks me out cause he can tell I’m lonely and need someone to help me sweep up these skeleton bones. Nope. I’m going to be just fine. FINE, I say. FINE!

Needless to say, no more letting music put me to sleep. It takes me to bad, bad places. But I’m OK y’all, I swear. Just gonna keep the light on tonight and sleep with one eye open!

Happy Friday! Have a great weekend!

More from love

by HelloFlo N/A | 2 days ago
by Alice Little | 3 days ago
by Elizabeth Yuko | 3 days ago
by Monica Beyer | 4 days ago
by Caitlin Flynn | 5 days ago
by Allie Gemmill | 13 days ago
by Monica Beyer | 15 days ago
by Katie Smith | 20 days ago
by Alice Little | 24 days ago
by Meagan Morris | 24 days ago
by Elizabeth Yuko | 25 days ago
by Allie Gemmill | a month ago
by Monica Beyer | a month ago
by Stefanie Iris Weiss | a month ago
by Anabelle Bernard Fournier | a month ago
by Colleen Stinchcombe | a month ago