Love At Second, Third or Fourth Sight?

5 years ago

My cousin Gin called me yesterday.  She and her husband, Cul will be celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary in May.

     I asked her to tell me the story of their romance.

     She met her husband when she was 12 years old and Cul was 16.  He spotted her on the playground and would talk to her through the fence.  My aunt and mostly my uncle would not allow Gin to "see" Cul until she was 14.  Then Cul was allowed to come to the house, but was not allowed inside.  So, it was mostly conversations on the front steps.

     When Gin was 16, Cul was finally invited into the house and Gin was allowed to go to a movie with him.   Uncle had stringent rules about that, too.  If the movie ended at 10:30, Gin had to be home by 10:00.  I'm not sure I see the logic in that.  Perhaps Uncle thought that style of curfew would "curb their enthusiasm".

     When Gin turned 18, she and Cul became engaged.  They were married a year later.

     Interestingly enough, Gin and Cul's daughter, had a similar romance with her husband.  They met when they were young teenagers.  They are still together after 20 plus years of marriage.

     Gin and Cul's son, same thing.  Their marriage was not planned, but necessary, if you know what I mean.  He was 17, she was 16.  Yep, still together.

     I believe all three couples have good and happy marriages.

     In my large family of sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, and cousins, divorce is not uncommon.  Many members of the family are on their second, third and even fourth marriages.  (Present company included.)

     What was it about the relationships of my cousin's family that made their marriages last?   How did they know that the partners they chose, at such early ages, would be their lifelong partners?  After all none of them had other experiences with which to compare theirs to.

     Was it a matter of religious beliefs?  They are practicing and devout Catholics, which means divorce is not an option.

     Gin's grandmother and grandfather and her mother and father were married til death parted them.

     Why did they respect the commitments they made to their marriages and each other, when so many other couples can't seem to?

     Perhaps for Gin and Cul it was simply a matter of long lasting love, even if it was at first sight.

     Do you know that couple?  They went to the prom together.  They hold hands like teenagers and dance the slow dances just like they did in high school.  When he starts to tell that same story again, she teases him, with a "oh, not that one again" and then giggles at the end as if she is hearing it for the first time.

She calls him Babe and he calls her Gorgeous.  Her mom moved in with them when she was too ill to take care of herself and she couldn't have done it without him.  He held her hand through each and every chemo treatment.   And after 50 years they renewed their vows of loving respecting and cherishing one another.

     Some have found a love like that more than once, but some (of us) have had to try on a few others before they (we) finally found the (our) perfect  fit.

I have created a page for Anna's Diary.  It can be found under the Tab titled Anna's Diary.

I have posted all of the entries to date there, starting with January 1, 1929.

Here is today entry from Anna's Diary:

Tues. March 26 1929

Junior invited to Gloria Casales party who was four years old.  Quite a bunch there.  At night the Belleville club met here for first time since my Ridge St. residence. 


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