…Just a LITTLE ‘Tied Up’…
Ok, I could come up with a myriad of excuses for why it’s been so long since I’ve written, ranging from severe illness to complete hibernation (winters in Michigan will do that to a person)….and those excuses would not be completely untrue. However, I’d rather just say, “I’ve been a little tied up.”
That expression always makes me smile.
I’ve made mention of the term ‘bondage’ in prior newsletters, and I’d like to toy with the notion a bit today. Many people hear that term and immediately envision whips, chains, pain, and all sorts of ‘extreme’ behavior.
While I will say that bondage ‘as a lifestyle’ can seem a bit extreme to the average person, there are many interesting – and useful aspects of bondage as well. I’d like to stretch your minds into something along those lines in this article.
Let’s back up a bit. Let’s think about the ‘sexual’ concepts that naturally tend to enter our minds when we think about orgasms. I believe, that many men spend their sexual lives basically ‘trying NOT to cum.’ What I mean is, men are programmed to try to WAIT for the woman. Hold back. Fight orgasm until the woman has one (at least one…) and THEN, and only then, it is ‘ok’ for them to have their orgasm. We can discuss whether or not that is REALLY necessary in another article, but suffice it to say, for now,
Men are Generally Programmed to Hold Back
Conversely, women have a different mindset, when it comes to orgasm. Women spend much of our sexual lives TRYING to CUM. Most of us know, or THINK we know, that if we don’t hurry up and cum, he might cum, and then we might not GET our orgasm. At least that is how we are programmed to think. Hurry. Relax. Let it happen…QUICKLY! Again, I am not saying that it is a FACT that we MUST hurry, but let’s try to agree, for now,
Women are Generally Programmed to TRY HARD to Cum
Wouldn’t you think, if this is true, that men – AND WOMEN – might enjoy an occasional escape from the norm?
After all, it is common for men enjoy the occasional ‘QUICKIE’ right? This is basically a reversal from the norm, and an opportunity for a man to simply dive in and cum hard and fast, without focusing on holding back. Seems perfectly natural to want that on occasion, doesn’t it?
Given this, wouldn’t it seem natural for it to follow that a woman would want to also experience a reversal of her norm?
I propose that one of the most erotic experiences a woman can have is the opportunity to try NOT to cum….and LOSE.
By losing, I mean she needs to be ‘brought’ to orgasm, but only after she has been given the opportunity to fight it. She definitely WANTS to lose that effort, and her partner needs to make sure she does! She wants to be able to trust and give the responsibility for her orgasm to her partner.
I can tell you from experience, this can be the MOST INTENSE ORGASM a woman will ever have.
With those ideas firmly in our minds, let’s now bring in the bondage aspect. It can be much easier to give this ‘gift’ to a woman (and allow her the opportunity to fight it) if you incorporate a little mild bondage. This can be in the form of simply holding her hands over her head, using those cute fuzzy handcuffs you have all seen before, or using some other form of restraint.
Remember, this is FUN, and you need to work WITHIN HER COMFORT ZONE, but it is easiest when you have your own hands free to ..well…HANDLE the situation! It doesn’t hurt to bring along my friend, the Hitachi massager, as well. I don’t think there are too many women who could ‘win’ the battle against that!
MOST IMPORTANT CONCEPTS:
Keep things FUN and WITHIN HER COMFORT ZONE
…and DON’T let her win!
Yours in Open Minded Honesty,