Does everyone do this? I mean, OK, post-breakup I also reevaluate myself and my life, and do healthy things for myself like get sleep and exercise and maybe a facial. Take down pictures, change online statuses, yada, yada, yada.
And then I buy myself a present.
It started in undergrad when the combination of a bad breakup and my first store credit card combined to create the perfect environment for post-breakup excess. I bought myself over $100 of shiny new underwear from JByrons. Oh yeah, classy.
I didn't wear cotton again for years.
And yes, I've paid off the bill.
Last breakup, I bought myself a shiny, romantic resin print by Mark Brunner. It says "The Ultimate Gamble; Next to this, everything else pales." Which certainly seemed apropos at the time - Well, anytime really.
What makes a good breakup present to myself? Like all good presents, by my estimation, it should be fun and bonus. A new disk drive doesn't count (clearly, nothing tax deductible counts), but a new video game might.
It has to be something I wouldn't have bought myself otherwise. A splurge.
And I tend to pick items that are also romantic and/or pretty; it has to make me feel romantic and/or pretty. Hence, silky underwear and romantic plaques. I'm buying a little happiness, after all. It's got to be something that puts a smile on my face every time I look at it.
OK. So you might not guess this about me if you met me, but I do love jewelry. I wear very basic silver jewelry most of the time, and that is part of who I am and I like it, but it's also a reflection of what I totally shouldn't be spending money on. Can you get more unpractical than jewelry? So I try to have a few pieces I feel good about wearing everyday.
That said, while I'd never own tons and tons of jewelry, I do like wearing different pieces when I dress up, or adding the occasional anklet or bracelet.
And, this may seem bizarre, but my ring situation has been bothering me for ages now. I lost one here, realized another was pulling my hair out there. Somehow I'd gotten down to just my most basic silver rings, all but one of which I was totally over. So Sunday morning, I hit The Grove in Los Angeles single and I bought myself a breakup present. It's cheery, it's pretty, and I'm no longer annoyed by my rings. It's the kind of ring I'd be totally jealous if you were wearing.
One last thought about the breakup present. It has to be nice enough to be a personal splurge, but still a treat you can afford. Otherwise you're hurting yourself while you treat yourself, and that's no good. However, it does also have to be nice enough that it's a one item deal. I like my treat to ward off a week or month long spending spree because I was hurt! I deserve it!
No, I buy myself one break-up present, and I make it a good one.
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Contributing editor Liz Rizzo also blogs at Everyday Goddess.