How to heal?How to forgive?

7 years ago
This article was written by a member of the SheKnows Community. It has not been edited, vetted or reviewed by our editorial staff, and any opinions expressed herein are the writer’s own.

I met a man in October 2008 through a friend he was funny and confident and good looking,he kissed me and talked to me for over an hour about how he felt about me,that he had never had feelings like this before for someone he had just met.

Fast forward two years and we have two baby girls,he is the best father ever his daughters love him and I also love him his one failing to me is that he cheated on me for the first 8 months we were together. He kept up numerous relationships with women in different countries he made a fool of me by introducing me to two women he had slept with I didnt know it at the time.

He has slept with over 500 women in his 33 years,he has cheated on every partner he has ever had.

I am working on forgiving him for his misdeeds,but where do I start?

Is it worth working on US,or should I make it work for the sake of the children?

He has kissed another woman while I was pregnant,I dont know if he has ever cheated on me while I was pregnant other than this one kiss.

I am working on making myself a better person so my girls will have a good role model to look up to,I am afraid he will hurt my girls or let them down in some way.

How is anything this important repaired? How do I regain my trust in people?

He tells me he loves me and that I am beautiful.Should I believe him,or should I listen to the voice inside me that says I should love myself and find myself beautiful before I can let another man say those things?

I am determined not to be eaten up by my jealously to not become paraniod but where does the healing process start? This long dark road I must go is lonely and terrifying but I hope I can do it with a smile on my face.

This is my first attempt at writing anything down so please excuse any mistakes of any kind.

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