They Won't Be Able to Resist You Online

6 years ago

There are three kinds of pitches in the world: the ones you throw away with minor skimming; those for things so amazing, you don't have to read them, and those so bizarre, you read them eight times and spend an hour researching not necessarily because you want to write about them, but because you need to know if they're true.

The perfume Erox is one such thing. It's a unisex scent and contains synthetic human pheromones -- which is neither here nor there, as the scientific community still needs to reach a consensus on this whole human pheromone business. No, what's interesting about this perfume is not what's in it (the press release made no mention of what scents -- if any -- would be involved beyond this amazing synthetic pheromone, which actually comes from coral), it's how it's being pitched as the "Made for Social Media" attraction fragrance.

Yeah, they went there. Because in the task of completely discrediting the power of the internet, it's not enough to have a million gurus and experts running around selling hot air promises with no hope of ROI, we need a perfume line, too.

Perhaps we're being too harsh. We should wait out the patent and development and see how many trolls we catch with our newly-sprayed wrists. About that -- no word yet on how they plan to get the "scent" to potential mates through our laptop screens and mobile devices.

AV Flox is the editor of Sex and the 405 -- what your newspaper would look like if it had a sex section.

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