This is a repost from my blog, Celibacy Diaries.
The other day, I talked to a man, who had conflicting views about sex, compared to mine. I gave him my views, I listened to his. I haven't called him since. As soon as I told him, I was not having sex, his first question (which annoys me because I heard it before) was How are you going to satisfy your man, if you get into a relationship? I told him I would not.
Some of his beliefs included:
- God designed pre-marital sex for all of us to enjoy.
- A woman needs to satisfy her man in a relationship.
- Foreplay (even heavy) is ok during abstinence or celibacy.
- I never think about men, who I never slept with. It can cause expectations, then frustration because he did not live up to the fantasy.
- Regular sex partners got precedence over potential new partners or those sporadic, every now and then sex partners.
- Men, who performed certain acts, got precedence over everyone. I will cancel on whoever to get that type of pleasure.
- If I wasn't into you, I might still have sex with you because we both was available. You will be a one-night stand. Nothing will change my mind on this. I will delete your name and number afterwards.
- Calling me days, months, years, later will not make me remember you. If I am not calling you and you are not calling me, then it was just sex. We didn't have a friendship or anything serious. Asking me Why haven't you called me opens you up for either sarcasm or open, blunt honesty, which you do not want depending on my mood.
- Never ask how you was in bed. This opens up up for either sarcasm or open, blunt honesty, which you may or may not want. I will happily tell you if you are good or great. I will try to maintain a line of communication, just in case future sex occurs. If you are bad or just average, see number 4.
- If you are having sex with me because you overheard something from someone else, I had sex with. Don't expect the same results. If he a good or great, regular penis, then I am performing better. When you do what he do, then you can get what he get. Now if I just wasn't into him for whatever reason, then his name and number are deleted. If I sleep with you, the same thing may happen.