Be The Boyfriend You Wish You Had

3 years ago

Yes, you read the title correctly. It was a toss up between the one I chose and “Treat Yourself The Way You Wanted To Be Treated.” I don’t know how guys are, but when girls get together, all we do is bitch about our boyfriends. What they do wrong, why they can’t do anything right, what stupid ass thing they said, what stupid ass thing they did, etc, etc.

We could literally go on all day long. The ranting and raving usually ends with an end-of-the-night “I don’t want you to get the wrong idea because he really is a great guy” or “But I really do love him” — to which we always reply, “You don’t have to say that. I know he’s a good guy and, if you didn’t love him, you wouldn’t be with him.” Sometimes I like to throw in “because he’s such a dumbass that why would you be with him if you didn’t love the idiot?”.

Anyway, after years upon years of complaining about our boyfriends’ juvenile stupidity, my friends and I have decided to be the boyfriend that we wish we had. It’s pretty much the same concept as the Destiny’s Child’s Independent Women song. You can love him as much as you want, but don’t let his actions make you feel bad anymore.

You want to go to an expensive dinner and he won’t take you? Take yourself. You want beautiful flowers in a vase sitting in the center of your kitchen table? Buy them for yourself. You want to see a movie, or a Broadway show or a museum exhibit? Order the tickets and escort yourself. The same goes for jewelry or other less-sentimental items that you’ve had your eye on. If you love your boyfriend but he’s not doing these things for you, complain less and treat yourself more.

And it's not just for taken women, either. When I was single, I would constantly take myself out to dinners with friends, shop, and treat myself to manicures and hair appointments all the time. (I still do.) I can’t rely on a guy to swoop in and buy me everything I want — and I also can’t waste my life away wishing my boyfriend will have the caring, common sense, and money to do all of these things for me; therefore, I do it for myself.

Think about how much breath some women waste complaining or how many hours of sleep they lose burdened by the thoughts of not getting what they want out of a relationship (tangibly-speaking). If you don’t want to break up with him (or if you’re single and don’t have a boyfriend at all), then simply be the boyfriend you wish you had.

Have you ever been your own boyfriend?

Keep on keepin' on,


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