You Gotta Know What You Want to Get What You Want

4 years ago

By Mary Foley

How many times do you race off in the morning, going from one thing to another until you drop? And then those days turn into weeks, and weeks turn into months or years, until you’re frustrated and confused and say, “Hey, what am I doing?” Or, as Dr. Phil McGraw would say, “How’s that working for ya?”

You can’t decide how to get where you’re going until you decide where you are going and why.  Well, duh.  But so often you don’t.  I don’t.  We don’t.

Stop it, just stop it!  Stop being a good girl and start being a bodacious woman.

Good girls follow what they believe to be life’s track—without much consideration if it’s the track they want to be on. There’s the mommy track that goes something like this:  Get married, buy a house, have a child, have another child, maybe have a third child, get a bigger house, go on some vacations, launch kids from the nest, retire with husband.

Then there’s the career track:  Go to college, get an entry-level job, work your way up, change companies, go back to college, become a VP, work like a madwoman, perhaps get promoted to Senior VP or higher, retire with or without husband or significant other.

For many women, it’s the combo mommy and career track:  Go to college, get a starter job, fall in love, get promoted, get married, buy a home, have a child, become a VP, squeeze in an evening MBA, take a few vacations, have another child, don’t even think about a third one, buy a bigger house, spring the kids from the nest, remember what your husband looks like, go for your last rung on the career ladder, retire with or without husband. And on and on.

These are just a few of the common tracks women take. A bunch of women are creating a whole new track. It includes ditching their corporate careers to start their own businesses so they can have more control to create a life that’s more satisfying for themselves and their family. I call this the “I’m laying down my own d@*& track!”

The point is this:  What track are you on and do you like where it’s headed? Do you know what you want?  Have you ever given it much thought? Or, are you simply moving in the direction you believe you were supposed to? You gotta know what you want to get what you want.  Really want.

Good girls don’t ask themselves such questions and just go along for the ride. Bodacious Women are the conductors of their own trains. They consider the messages they received growing up. They look within to determine how they feel and what’s right for them. Bodacious Women don’t make all the same choices, but all Bodacious Women make deliberate choices for themselves. (Then they have a disco Friday.)


Image used from Mary’s book Bodacious! Woman:  Outrageously in Charge of Your Life and Lovin’ it! 


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