When Logic meets Feelings

4 years ago
This article was written by a member of the SheKnows Community. It has not been edited, vetted or reviewed by our editorial staff, and any opinions expressed herein are the writer’s own.


Copy of Title Template-5     Throughout August, I have been writing about self-discovery.  I wrote about being a millennial and why I started blogging.  Reflecting on who I am and how I spend my time is really helpful for me.  I try to be thoughtful about my decisions, so taking the time to reflect on who I am and why I make my decisions is essential.

I mostly think logically about my life and my decisions.  I need things to make sense wholly before I can move forward.  I’m not usually someone who does things based on the “gut feeling.”

I joined a book and read Danielle LaPorte’s book, The Desire Map.  LaPorte asks the reader, “How do you want to feel after making a decision?  How do you want to feel at the end of the day?”  She also encourages the reader to list a few “core desired feelings” to remind the reader of how they truly want to feel so that they can make decisions accordingly.  Since closing the back cover, I have thought a lot about my feelings.


To be honest, thinking about my feelings is, for me, entering new territory.  I don’t usually think much about how I feel.  I’m kind of a black-and-white person.  Feelings are largely illogical, and I like logic.  For most of my life, I have put aside my feelings to search for the logical answer.  To me, this only makes sense.

But this book changed my perspective.  I have thought much more about how I want to feel and have made decisions accordingly.


Today, my “core desired feelings” are:

  • Independent
  • Abundant
  • Loved
  • Connected
  • Brave
  • Empowered
  • Reliable
  • Inspired/Challenged
  • Intentional

For example, I don’t like to feel stressed, especially in the mornings.  So, Sundays are very important for me get ready for the week by doing laundry, making meals, picking out my outfits, and taking time to think about my calendar and the upcoming week.  Therefore, I rarely make plans on Sundays.  I know that Sundays are very important for me to have a stress-less, smooth week, so I intentionally block that day off on my calendar to prepare.  Feeling prepared (a branch of intentional, no?) is important to me, so I make a conscious effort to ensure I have time to prepare.

In the comments below, tell me, have you taken time out of your life to really understand who you are and why you do the things you do?  What are your “core desired feelings?”  Do you make decisions based off of logic or feeling?



Amber is the Life Coach at Climb Out of The Cubicle.  Follow her on Twitter.

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