What I don't like about my body and why it doesn't matter

5 years ago

I am just like you.  I have my own body image problems.  While yours are sure to be different than mine, just about everyone I know doesn't like something about myself.  Let me share some things I don't like about myself:

While I love my smile, I hate my cavity-ridden, chipped front tooth, spaced top and crowded bottom teeth smile. 

While I may be slim and nowhere near being deemed "overweight" I gave birth to twins two years ago and let's just say my stomach is not what it used to be.  I have loose jiggly skin where once was tight abs and I feel like no amount of crunches or ab workouts will really change that fact.  Twins changed this stomach for good and I now have a lower-stomach pudge common to women all over the world.

While I generally think I am pretty, I have days I think my face looks disgusting thanks to an endless onslaught of zits and pimples. 

While I generally like my hair, wavy and thicker, some days it just does not do what I want it to and looks so awful!

While I like my height, 5' 9" tall, I don't like the big feet that have grown along with that height over the years.  I wear size 11 shoes.  It is very difficult to find size 11 shoes.  Did you know some shoe stores don't even carry that size?  And I also like wearing heels.  It's so feminine, yet I have to be careful how high because I don't want to be a skyscraper!  And my toes are long which sometimes presents problems when finding the cute shoes.

While I really like my eyelashes, full, long, and curly, and even my eye color, a mix of blue and green and one with a dash of brown, I don't always love my eyebrows.  In fact I am an avid eyebrow plucker.  But, trust me it's needed.  Otherwise I'd have a unibrow problem going on.  But, recently, in the last month, I grew out more of my natural brow, giving in to its fullness and actually like it, though I think all the diligent plucking over the years has made them look a little less full than they perhaps should be.

And while I like my figure generally, I don't always love the fact that I have small breasts.  I have hips and a booty, but very little breasts.  But, let me tell you something about these little girls - they breastfed two babies simultaneously for over a year.  Amazing right?  But, they were much bigger then (still relatively small for most people though I am sure!)

So, why, do you ask, am I talking about these things that I don' like about myself?  Because women (and men!) have a hard time coming to terms with their own body, and I am no exception. 

But, I know that these bodily imperfections do not define who I am.  I am not the skin I wear.  And while I wonder how others perceive me and if they think I am pretty, I am much more worried about how I am sounding than looking.  Am I coming off too loud or talkative?  Am I am asking enough questions in return?  Do they like me for me?  

I think I can get over the initial self-awareness more easily because I am married.  I don't have to impress the gentlemen anymore, just a gentleman.  And he thinks I am beautiful every. single. day. no matter if I haven't showered in three days and am wearing my pajamas.  He loves me for me and likes the skin I am in.  Talk about a boost to the self-love meter! 

But, even without a man praising my looks and beauty, I know that my looks are not as important as the media makes them to be.  People throughout my life have loved me for me. They've loved my quirky, jokey, crazy self.  They see something deep within that draws them back to me.  And that's how it is with all people.  Sure there's an initial impression and first looks, but actions, words, deeds, and a person's very aura turn people either beautiful or grotesque.  True colors eventually shine for good or ill. And those who colors are truly beautiful are beautiful outside too.

While I am not trying to say "I'm beautiful here people! Look at me!" I am trying to say that I feel beautiful whether or not someone's first impression of me agrees with that or not.  While I am not a perfect angel or do-gooder, I think that I have something to offer to others - myself in all its quirkiness and imperfections.  And that is what makes me feel beautiful even when I may not look it every day.

So may I encourage everyone to improve themselves, love themselves, and worry more about how your actions, words, deeds, and aura are coming off rather than your expensive perfume and smokey eyes. 


Learn more about me at whatsupfagans.blogspot.com

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