What do I want to be?

We have a lot of firsts in our lives...Tomorrow will be my first official day as a SAHW (stay at home wife).  It should have started earlier than this but I agreed to do P/T consulting for the company I had been working for.  

I am still at a loss as what to do with myself.  My husband knew I needed a cuddle tonight, as I will be embarking on my new journey tomorrow. As we sat on the couch cuddling and talking about how I felt lost, he asked me what I wanted to do.  What have I always wanted to be?  I paused and told him that my therapist asked me the same thing during out last session (yes, I have a therapist and I absolutely love her...this is a whole different blog for another time). I said we do not live where we could do what I really wanted to do as a child, teenager and young adult and that was act.  He asked why not, but Indiana is not really the market for that, although there is a lot of local theater groups, I am just not sure that is really where my passion lies anymore.  The problem is I am not really sure where my passion lies.  I used to love politics, after all I was a Political Science major.  Is this what I want to do?  I love to read but I am not really sure what I can do with that. This should not be a hard question but for some reason it is.  I think when we get so bogged down in things, maybe we just do not know what we want to do.  I know there is something out there for me but right now I am just not sure what that is.  The thing is I need to learn not to fear the unknown, to take this time and enjoy the blessing and opportunity that I am being provided with.  I am excited and scared at the same time.  

So wish me good luck during my first day tomorrow.  Thank goodness I will be seeing my therapist tomorrow! :-)  

I know that I will learn a lot about myself during this time and I need to remind myself to stop and enjoy this time. I look forward to blogging about this adventure.

Anyone want to take bets on how long it will be before I am out there looking for another job?  My husband gives me two months.

Maybe I will have something inspiring to blog about tomorrow after my session.  Or maybe not.  Either way I will start my new journey with a smile on my face.

Goodnight and God Belss from Life Adentures in Indiana!

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