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4 years ago

It's a new year and I'm overwhelmed. I'm feeling very overwhelmed as I look around at all the things strewn about our dwelling. As I log onto my Bloglovin' feed, I see there are easily well over 200 posts to read, not read, comment and participate. I know I made something like a promise on New Year's Eve that I'd return and participation is part of this return. I'm overwhelmed.

As routine sets back in, the pile of clothing that needs to be washed overwhelms me. Dinner that needs to be decided on, prepared, and cooked overwhelms me. The routine that is our normal daily life overwhelms me because I'm not ready, or more aptly, our home isn't ready for routine. We haven't really spent any time here since December 20, 2013. Oh, and did I mention the business venture that Hun is working on? I am simply overwhelmed.

photo credit: Fu Man Jew via photopin Not our actual dirty clothescc

photo credit: Fu Man Jew via photopin Not our actual dirty clothescc[/caption]

I really feel like curling up in bed with Baby and going back to sleep. It's a bit chilly and the skies are looking gray, so staying in bed really is inviting. In fact, as I'm writing this post with actual pen and paper, I'm in bed. I've been up for more than an hour, yet I'm really just still in bed. At this moment it seems I may stay here a bit longer. I know I can create an excuse to stay in bed - Baby needs to eat, I need to eat and my blood sugar's getting low making me sleepy, last night was a bit later than expected, the sun's not shining, it's a bit chilly, I don't feel like it. Really, no matter the excuse, I simply don't really want to.

I'm not really sure where to start without going crazy. So, I'm sitting here in bed writing about it.

This. Right now. works. And, this. Right now. is manageable. Right now, although Baby is peacefully and quietly sleeping, not demanding a single thing, I too, am choosing to be peaceful. I'm choosing not to rush around making myself crazy just because there are so many things to do which do make me crazy. Right now, I'm choosing happiness, peace, and serenity. Right now I'm writing about this choice and how it is ok. It's not only ok, it's important. It's necessary. In order for me to give being my best a fighting chance, I need this.

Busy making memories. Memories that will last. Memories that will carry us through until we see people again. Memories that are ours. Our First full family of 3 holiday season. Baby's First Christmas. Baby's First New Year's. Even my blog's First holiday season. Lessons were learned, unexpected realities were noticed, and new or renewed relationships were formed. Some respect was lost for others and although the grieving process hasn't fully opened, I know it's there. Some respect for others was gained though. So many important things. Things I hope to explore and discuss more in the coming days. Things I also hope to hold on to.

Christmas 2013 - Florida Christmas 2013 - Florida

I'll relish these few calm, quiet moments under the covers with our Baby Boy before I take on the messy remnants of our busy, fun and love-filled life. I look at the mess with eyes full of love and thankfulness and happiness. This is our life.

Welcome to 2014! Welcome, once again, to our journey as we travel through life.

New Year 2014

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