Wanting

10 years ago
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Why is it that I am always wanting? I swear to god, I could spend millions of dollars and still have a plethora of desperately wanted items. I don't know how my honey deals with it. He's so used to me starting everyfuckingsingleone of my sentences with "I want..." followed up by a puppy, pony, hyena (odd, I know, but they're so cute!) shoes, clothes, car, house, any number of beauty enhancing products or services.... I could go on for hours, but I'll spare you. I have been quite content with my life and possessions for the past while since he let me get a new puppy. This puppy has got to be the cutest, sweetest, most lovable little ball of fur I've ever seen in my life. My BF was sweet enough to let me name him even tho I named our last dog, and he was dying to name the little pup after his favorite football team. Toby

I should be perfectly happy with my life-I have an amazing, sweet, thoughtful boyfriend. I have two adorable dogs (although the one is such a little shit, she reminds me of a rebellious teenager), I'm going to school so I can have a career I will love, I am not destitutely poor, I have a family that loves me, even though we may all have a hard time showing it, and I have my health. This cracks me up-I also get to laugh every day, and that's a gift of happiness.

Why is it that the poorest people in the world can also be the happiest, and the richest can be so extremely unhappy? Is it their outlook on life? Is it ignorance? Do poor people just not know what they're missing? Or is it the rich people who don't understand what they are missing out on? What is it that actually makes a person happy? Is it love? Confidence? Accomplishment? Money? Success? Wisdom? A combination of all these? Or maybe it's as simple as a sense of self, or frame of mind.

One of my favorite quotes goes like this "Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy."

I'm going to do my best to follow that thought, enjoy what I have right here and now, and stop worrying about all the things I want but don't really need. I pray to Jesus, Buddha, Allah, the sun gods and mother mary to give me strength to do this.

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