1. Silence is criticism.
2. Your partner suggesting you may have seasonal depression is tantamount to accusing you of schizophrenia.
3. One social screw up motivates you to end casual friendships.
4. Your heart starts racing and you start to sweat when your kid tells you another child is messing with her at school.
5. You cry in a restaurant for any reason other than someone dying.
6. First world problems are your only problems, and yet you feel persecuted by them.
7. You verbally abuse cable company employees on the phone.
8. You blame all of your shortcomings on your parents.
9. You get trapped in deep conversation with a bar's bathroom attendant when you're drunk.
10. Argument's don't end until one of you passes out.
Guilty, guilty, guilty. This fuzzy picture from 2007 perfectly illustrates the side of me that I'm desperately trying to suppress now that I'm an older, wiser, 'better' version of myself.
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