There is no such thing as the easy or the hard way, just the best way for you to achieve your desires!

4 years ago

I am often amazed when I look back on choices that I made that I thought were the easy way to achieve my goal or desire.  So many times the "easy" way turned out to be so "hard",  exactly the opposite result that I expected!  Not only have I noticed this with my own life but with those close to me.  When you attach judgement to your actions, is this going to be easy or hard, you cloud the issue, losing site of the what you want out of the situation: the end result that you want to happen.  How many times have you taken a short cut or cut corners because you thought it was easier or would save time, only to have it turn into a big mess that took you twice as long to rectify than if you just did it the best way to get the result the first time.  I know that I've been guilty of attaching judgement, negative or positive emotions to an inanimate situation.  Really stop and think about it, the situation is what it is, we are the ones that attach the emotion where there is none. We create the drama, not the situation.  Only by focusing clearly on the result you want to achieve in a situation, not attaching judgement to the choices that lead to the results can you follow the best route for your situation.  Think of it as shining a extremely bright spot light on the result that you want, blinding away everything else, so you focus just on getting to your result with out coloring the situation with judgement and emotion. Clearly focusing on your desire leads you to choose the route that will take you to your wanted end result. 


A few months ago I was speaking on this topic to a Woman's group when after my talk an audience member, Lauri, approached me to share her story in relationship to my talk.  Lauri was facing a similar dilemma with her job.  She told me that she had just started a new sales job three months ago which she was enjoying.  What Lauri especially liked about her job was the geography of her territory.  She was working within a 50 mile radius of her home which greatly increased her quality of life by reducing the miles and time that she had to drive each week.  Lauri said that just this week her company announced an expansion with the addition of twenty new territories.  At first Lauri thought this was positive change with the company doubling in size until her manager enlightened her that two territories would drastically change, hers being one.  The boundaries of her existing territory would more than quadrupled. The company decided to hire an additional sales person splitting her territory into two creating one new territory with a 250 mile radius and the second new territory with 150 mile radius.  Even thought she could choice to work the smaller territory her driving and work time would tripled!  Ironically this is the same situation that Lauri faced four years ago with another sales job.  In her previous position when faced with her territory doubling in size she stayed only to have her territory eliminated two years later in a company downsizing.  As we discussed her situation I could see how she was assigning emotional values to her options,  good, bad, hard or easy.  I gently pointed out to her that her situation had no human emotions, she had all the emotions which was coloring her choices with judgement.  Lauri would not be able to make the best choice for her through the haze of her emotions.  In order for her to make the best possible choice for her situation she need to let go of all the emotional baggage she threw at her situation.  See what is really there, see the pure potential and light of the situation clearly not clouded by judgemental emotion.  Quite simply I asked her with out thinking about good, bad, hard easy, what do you really want in this situation.  Looking at the situation purely she said what she wanted was not to spend all the extra time driving and on the road.  The rewards of her job, money, career growth, personal satisfaction did not tip the scales in favor of staying at her job.  By looking at her situation with out judgement Lauri was able to see the best decision for her to make at this time.  Lauri's new territory change would take effect in two months leaving her with time to start a job search for a new position with less driving.  Lauri was excited with the prospect of finding the best route for her to take and was looking forward, not dreading finding a new job! Lauri shared with me that before we discussed her situation she was going to take what she thought was the "easy choice" just stay at her present position, not take act on "hard choice" starting a job search, going on interviews with all the preparation and work associated with finding a new job.  Lauri realized that she needed to make the choice that was aligned with what she wanted to achieve in her situation which was not increasing her work and drive time.  For Lauri by looking at the situation and making the decision based on the results that she wanted she immediately knew what to do. She followed her desire without attaching any emotion to her choice.


By attaching judgement, emotion, labeling a situation as Lauri started to do at the beginning of our conversation,  you make your choice based on incorrect emotional signals, not on what your desire out of the situation. More clearly always look to the results that you want to achieve, don't put all those negative hurdles in your path to trip up you up before you get to the finish line.


 Facing your situation directly and clearly this way is not easy, hard, good, bad, right, wrong, it just is!


Live your desires!

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