I’m trying to believe that my career isn’t ending. I’m trying to do everything I can to heal, but the tendonitis in my wrists and elbows continues to be a problem. I still am not able to perform massage and have been working under restrictions: do not lift, push or pull more than 10 pounds.
I feel like my current livelihood is on the line. I fear that I may never be able to return to my job in my prior capacity. I’m trying to wrap my head around the possibility that a career change might be on the horizon whether I like it or not.
I’m struggling to stay positive.
At times, my spirit feels crushed under the worry about what the future holds. I know it is just tendonitis, but when you use your hands to make your living, wrist and tendon issues can be devastating, life-changing.
But positivity is exactly what I need to help me get better. Without it, I will just flounder hopelessly beneath all this worry. So this weekend I decided to try to flip my attitude around and crawl out from under the worry. This weekend was all about doing things that made me smile.
I treated myself to a massage, for some physical and mental healing. I went shoe shopping. I visited the community garden and admired the seeds sprouting. I spent time in the kitchen and time taking photographs. I baked a perfect loaf of herb-crusted bread (thanks, once again to the stand mixer). I watched a great movie and ate a big bowl of popcorn.
And I made ice cream. If ice cream doesn’t make you smile, I don’t know what will. This simple, delicious strawberry ice cream is like a big, toothy grin in a bowl. The bright, fresh strawberry flavor is a scoop of happiness, a scoop of dance around the kitchen, a scoop of it’s going to be all right.
I often write about being grateful and how grateful I am for the most basic things I have: a home, clean running water, a garden, a job, warm clothing, furry kitties, a spouse who loves me to the ends of the earth. But sometimes when pain and fear enter your life, it becomes more difficult to see those things.
I’m working through it, rebuilding my positivity, my hope, one bowl of goodness at a time. Strawberry and otherwise.
The recipe for Strawberry Ice Cream is from Stephanie at Eat Drink Love, though she calls it Sherbet. For once in my life I followed the recipe exactly and it turned out great! I love the simplicity of it. I love that the ice cream maker does all the work.
Nothing is impossible to a willing heart.
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