I am under a writing deadline. And like any good writer, I have paced, talked on the phone, made tea, groomed myself unnecessarily, and vacuumed obsessively (this time it was the compartment in the fridge that houses the fan components. Who knew there were so many wires involved?). I have also waylaid my unsuspecting loved ones and demanded they tell me how amazing I am, and how much they believe in me. Never underestimate how important it is to surround yourself with people who not only believe in you, but who are willing to tell you this time and time again. It makes all the difference in the world. We can accomplish a lot without hearing those words, but when someone tells you they believe in you, it is like supercharging your success.
So, the above had to happen because when I sit down to write, I must repeatedly leap out of my chair and begin a series of activities that result in me not writing. I don’t know why this is, but I believe it is a fairly common occurrence with writers. It must be because writers are masochistic in nature. Although sometimes I think it is because we are hedonistic. Pain pleasure? Pleasure pain? I don’t know, but I do know that it is a gorgeous weekend and I could be out having fun, enjoying the beauty of summertime in California. Instead I sit here. Inside. Writing something that is not the thing I must write, the thing that I am under deadline to write.
Deadline? What kind of sadist came up with “dead – line.” Images of death accompanying every line I write? No thank you. How about a new word with a new image? Lifeline? Lifeline! Yes, I prefer that, my words providing a lifeline to community and a larger whole. Perhaps a lifeline to and from the divine, as well as to that single individual who may be moved by something I write. I like to imagine creating a resonance in another human being that comes at an opportune moment, and provides a lifeline to a soul connection, rather than a deadline to an end.
And so with that, I now choose to begin to write the thing that before felt like a small death, but that now I can see will open up my life to more connection and hopefully, impact someone somewhere in a way that creates comfort, engenders change or just plain makes someone feel less alone.
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