Leaning into my inner-child has given me a sense of purpose, fuels me with a life energy which I had long lost and offers me with a clear vision, which keeps me going each and every day.
As a little child I spent most of my time creating; baking, cooking, writing stories, poems, making up plays, writings songs, creating puppet shows, cooking and talk shows…. The sky was my limit.
Kids around the neighbourhood of all ages came flocking to my home to catch the latest “episode” which I presented to them. Soon enough they all were inspired to do join in, adding their own bits and pieces or creating their own shows. We all helped each other out, learned from each other and we all felt special-because this was our world-our space for us and by us! What I loved most was that our activities brought everyone together, all the popular kids, the bullied kids; everyone had a role in our world; everyone had something to offer and it was magical.
My biggest dream was to find ways to spread this great idea to other kids everywhere because I felt very strongly that children had great power in connecting to others, teaching and learning from each other in ways that only kids could do; and I knew that it was something special.
As soon as we began school, these creative adventurous shows came to a screeching halt. School matters took over and my dreams quickly dissipated into the routine of school life.
Fast-forward 25 years: I began my career rather early as a concert pianist, travelling and performing around the world. Eventually, I gave up performing and delved into education. I went to grad school at Oxford and Cambridge, obtained a PhD and found myself working as a consultant for multilateral institutions, schools and NGOs.
While everything seemed wonderful and I was successful at what I was doing, something was missing and deep inside I felt increasingly empty. I was always busy, running and running, doing and doing.
I ran and ran until a life-threatening illness took hold of me. My life, as I knew it was put on “hold”. 7 years later, I felt entirely debilitated, hopeless and prepared to succumb to the ill health.
A long hospital visit and a friendship to my 73-year old terminally ill roommate pushed me back into my childhood and into a space of hope. My roommate and I had a profound exchange of thoughts, stories, fears, dreams, hopes, laughs and tears.
“Who are you really and what do you really want to do in life”. “Be true to yourself, follow your heart. Reclaim your life!” Were some of the words that still resonate from our discussions and those which kissed my soul out of an elongated slumber.
I dreamt of scenes from my childhood and saw myself as vibrant, healthy, full of energy, overflowing with creativity and living my dream!
Dreams! My childhood dreams came flooding back to me. That was it! It was as if something opened within me.
Once I returned home, I began doing things, which nourished my heart. I found myself cooking, baking, writing books, songs and plays. I created the concept for my new start-up, carried out surveys with thousands of children from around the world and knew that I was onto something; a peer-to-peer video platform for children around the world to connect, communicate and learn from each other. I had no idea where this was all taking me, but I simply let go and leaned in to my inner child.
It was as if getting in touch with my inner child has given me so much strength to deal with my situation and I am convinced that it has significantly contributed towards my healing.
I am now living a life in flow, following my heart to wherever it takes me. When things flow, with no resistance, it is clearly a sign that you are on the right path and even though I have no idea as to where exactly it may all lead-I have realised that it is OK to lean in and enjoy the journey.
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