Well, my last post was more emotional than the first two. I realized now what others will (unfortunately) later about grief and loss. Grief is never over it changes you and you begin to learn to live, heal and rebuild who you are around the loss. You learn to live in the moment to moment which is much richer than day to day. You truly resonant in the seconds, minutes, moments, hours and then days your life continues after the loss. I'm not sad, miserable or mopey because that is not who God created me to be even through these unbearable events in my life. I enjoy my life and truly live it. My babies like most parents have changed who I am and how I am. It is God...yes...I still believe and have faith. This faith is the reason I am still here, sane, lively, loving and wanting more children. Without HIM I cannot imagine how I would or could have dealt with the loss of my children despite the moments of pain, emptiness HE is still there - making me in to this person unfolding before you.
Live, Laugh, Love and Learn with God
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