It's amazing how supporters and haters come out of the wood work when you start a new venture. Strangers may embrace you more than loved ones. The word "Hater" gets thrown around a lot and yes, in some instances it is not warranted. Some need not apply. However you may be a Hater if:
The thought of someone's success makes you feel threatened. Yes, it is scary when our loved ones grow and change. It feels uncertain when our friend or significant other wants to charter on a course that may be uncomfortable. Please do express your concerns in a kind and gentle manner. If you try to derail or come at your loved one harshly or you don't wish them success or happiness. Yes, you my friend are a hater.
If you try to intentionally sabotage someone who may be trying to live out their dream because you feel unfavorably towards it, yes you my friend are a hater. If you're meant to be with that person throughout that journey you will be there. If they love and care about you, you will be along for the ride. There's no need to not wish them well. We all shine in our unique way, just keep doing you and let the person do them. You never know where the journey may take you. Just be supportive and be a friend.
You're a negative nancy or nando. If you're constantly stating what might go wrong and how things can go bad, yada, yada, yada. Yes, you may be a hater. In life, there are no guarantees. Sometimes you simply have to step out on faith. All you can do is pray, make sure you're doing the right thing and work diligently towards your goal. If you find yourself having fault with someone who chooses to live on purpose - To live and not just existing, so what? It's that persons path not yours.
Threatening to "leave" them or not be there "for them" when things "go south."
Um, Yeah who deemed you God? How do you know how things will turn out? Did your magic 8-ball predict something different? That is not your concern. Let them figure it out. You don't have to be involved in the day to day. However ask yourself, <i>If I love and care for this person, why wouldn't I want the best for them?</i>
There is scripture in the Bible that says <i>"And as that others would do to you, do so to them" . The Quran quotes "<i>None of you will believe until you love for your brother what you love for yourself" (Bukhari and Muslim). It would be great if we all take heed to this. We're human. We're prone to negative feelings at times. We can get a little jealous when things are going great for others and we're struggling. It's important to remember that things will happen when they're supposed to. Take a deep breath. Recognize when your feeling a little salty. Pray for yourself and wish the other person well.
As I write this I am reminding myself to do the same.
Salaam and Peace!
Remember to keep it cute and classy!
What are your thoughts? Have you had haters as you've tried to accomplish your goals or make your dreams come true? How did you cope? Please share in the comment section!
Farida T. Dawkins
U.S. Air Force Reservist and Blogger
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