I've been blogging and writing and otherwise dancing the fine line between the two for almost six years now.
That's longer than I've held any one title (besides daughter, sister or wife) in my life. I taught school for 5 years, and I've only been "mommy" for 3 (four if you could the belly year).
To put that in writing surprises me, actually, as I feel a bit of a wandering spirit when it comes to trying on what I want to be when I grow up. I'll spare you all the stops along the way, but it's safe to say my vocational path has been a winding one with many forks, stops, and turn-arounds. Sometimes this is a source of great anxiety for me. (Okay, much-of-the-times this is a source of great anxiety for me.) Thankfully I often hear the words of one of my favorite college professors echoing in my head. In his 60's at the time and with a Ph.D and many years of accomplished teaching under his belt, he was quick to tell all of the junior writing students in his classroom that he still didn't know what he wanted to be when he grew up.
Because I don't know but sometimes I feel that I am definitely grown up and less and less sure each day. And I'm so grateful that I've had the opportunity to choose to stay home with my children and to continue my education (something which I still feel called to do), but I also feel this mounting pressure that I need to figure it out.
Well, friends, I still haven't figured it out.
But I do know this. I love stories. I love hearing stories and trying to tell them, both in word and in photo. And I hope that someday this might translate into a career helping to tell our faith stories - because I find them so elemental and profound and unique and similar and...I could go on. But, in order to get to the point where I have the background (ahem...the degree) to explore careers in faith and story-telling, I need to (ahem) finance that degree while we also put two kids through two more years of (ahem...not free) preschool.
Mama is going to work. With her beloved camera. And she's (mostly) excited (and a little terrified).
Tomorrow my babies start their first official year of preschool and I start my first official day as a photographer. After I drop off my sweet boys, and we dry up our tears, I'm off to the village to file my papers for Holli Long Photography. I'll still be here, on this blog writing and sharing stories (although the photos may take more center stage), and here, on Facebook.
And also, now, here.
Thank you so much for all the words of encouragement along the way. And thank you for putting up with the hundreds thousands of pictures of my own children.
Because I can't wait to see you and yours through my lens.
And we're off...
More from living