...... into how my brain works on any given day.
Do NOT proceed any further if you're at all squeamish.
Or get nightmares.
Or want visions of sugar plums dancing through your heads.
This is not for the weak of heart.
Or maybe even the pregnant or people with back problems.
Proceed at your own risk.
Don't blame me if you end up terrified.
You've been warned.
This morning I had plans to visit a church in our area that is rumored to have a fantastic singles program. They have a lot of activities, or so I've heard.
I could use more time with single people. Especially in large groups.
But ...... the best laid plans ...... and all that.
I ended up not sleeping too well (shocking, I know) and didn't get up in time.
So instead of doing that I decided to watch a movie and organize some of my Christmas presents (because I order most of them and then toss them in a closet when they arrive ....... I abhor wrapping and I tend to procrastinate when it comes to that job.)
Before I went to collect all of the packages, I went from the family room into the kitchen to rinse out my coffee cup and put it in the dishwasher.
I noticed that the dishwasher needed to be unloaded, so I opened it up and started putting away dishes. I got about 3 cups put away when I decided that I need to organize the glass/cup cabinet because things seem to be too crowded in there.
I ended up getting a step stool (because I have high shelves ..... not because I'm short) out and clearing out all of the cups and then re-aligned them. As I was doing that I noticed that a couple of glasses didn't belong in that cabinet so I took them to the other side of the kitchen, to the cabinet in which they belonged. And I noticed that that cabinet also needed to be straightened up. So I started clearing it out.
In the middle of that I realized I needed to visit the restroom, so I went back to my bedroom, where I found an empty water glass, and my laundry that needed to be done. I picked up the glass, and my pile of clothes and headed into the laundry room.
I put a load in the washer, started it, and then remembered that I hadn't put out any of the Christmas kitchen towels that I keep back there.
I opened up the cabinets in there and took out all of the Christmas stuff and carried it into the kitchen, where 2 sets of cabinet doors were open, as well as the door to the dishwasher, which still had not been fully unloaded.
I got out all of my Christmas napkins and replaced the paper napkins with them. Then I took the paper napkins back into the laundry room to put them away, when I noticed that I needed to add a couple of items to the wash.
I stopped the washer, added 2 more things and re-started it. Then I saw that there was a load of clothes in the dryer. Son #3's clothes, which I don't do. But I did need to take them out of the dryer so that I could put mine in when they were done. I removed his clothes and put them on the sofa in the family room. I saw that a Christmas throw lying on the sofa needed to be folded so I did that and put it back on the sofa. Then I noticed that a small clock behind the sofa wasn't running so I picked it up, went into the kitchen and looked for a battery, which I had. I replaced the battery and sat the clock down when I saw the stack of Christmas towels that still needed to be put in the kitchen towel drawer. But I had to empty said drawer before I could fill it, which I did. I put the regular towels into the bin that held the Christmas towels and then noticed that I hadn't finished up the glassware cabinet ..... or the other one.
I finished one cabinet, then saw the bin still needed to be taken back to the laundry room, took said bin into said room, noticed that I had left the water glass from my bedroom in the laundry room and picked it up.
I went back into the kitchen and saw that the dishwasher still wasn't unloaded, so I finally finished that, and finished the organizing of the glassware cabinet.
I then remembered that I never went to the restroom earlier. I walked back to my bedroom, saw some papers on my bed that needed to be taken to the study and looked through them. Then I looked up, and all around my room, trying to remember why I had gone in there.
I couldn't come up with a reason so I decided to re-trace my steps, after I took the papers to the study.
When I went into the study I saw some tape, which reminded me that I needed to go through all of the packages, which were in a closet in my room.
But before I could go through all of the packages I needed to go upstairs to the craft room (used to be Son #2's bedroom) and get some boxes out .... so I could put each person's gifts (that fit) into a box.
When I got into the craft room I saw that the cat had knocked over his water dish (he drives me crazy with that dang dish!) so I picked it up and put more water in it. I had it Velcroed to the the floor with those strips that stay forever, or until you pull on the rounded edge to release them. That's because he's always dragging/knocking over his dish. But someone had pulled the dish off of the strips, thus rendering them useless. I decided to replace them so I went back downstairs into the study, found the strips I needed and went back upstairs.
Before I could put the strips on I knocked the water dish over, spilling water everywhere. So I went into Son #3's bathroom to look for a towel, which I found on the floor (duh!) and went back to clean up the water.
Then I took the soaking wet towel down to the laundry room and noticed that the washer was done. I switched the clothes over to the dryer and started another load.
I then remembered the Christmas kitchen towels that I had put out and knew that I wanted to put out a few more Christmas decorations (I had about 5 out at the time .... not getting into the whole decoration thing this year). I went out into the garage and upstairs into the attic where all of the Christmas stuff is stored. I looked into a couple of boxes and decided to bring them downstairs, which I did.
I took the boxes into the family room and opened them up, took out about 5 more items, plus our stockings, closed the boxes and put them back into the garage.
I hung the stockings and arranged the 5 other items in the living room and family room.
Then I remembered that I needed to get some boxes from upstairs so I went back into the craft room, where I saw the Velcro strips sitting on the sink, waiting to be put on the empty water dish.
I affixed the strips, filled the water dish, spilled a lot of water, found another towel, cleaned up the water, grabbed the wet towel AND large bin of boxes and went downstairs.
I tossed the towel into the laundry room and put the boxes on the floor in the family room. Then I went back into my bedroom to collect all of the packages ...... which I managed to do!!! Progress!!!
I brought everything into the family room, started a movie I had DVR'd, remembered that it was like, 2:00 p.m. by now and I hadn't checked my email all day.
So I sat down and turned on my computer, checked my email, looked at a couple of websites for gift ideas and that reminded me of the catalogs I had stacking up that I wanted to look through. I shut my computer and started looking at the catalogs, tossing them into the recycling bin after I went through them.
While I was doing this I got a phone call on my house phone, which I rarely, if ever, answer. I saw that it was from my bank ...... on a Sunday ...... started to let it go and then thought better of it.
I'm glad I thought better of it. Because now some person in either Iowa or Pennsylvania (I can't remember which) knows that he/she won't be able to use my credit card number to buy one dang thing! Even at the Wal-Mart in which they were standing when I got the call.
People can really stink, you know?
I then spent the next 30 minutes or so verifying each and every purchase I had, or had not, made over the past week.
Do you know how many times a person who does all of her Christmas shopping on line uses her credit card???!!! I had to look through all of my emails to figure out if, when and how much I had spent at each site.
Not including the trip to NY.
I had descended into Christmas credit card hell.
But we finally wrapped that all up, cancelled my card (which means I'll now have to memorize ANOTHER set of numbers!), and wished each other a Merry Christmas. The people from my bank's fraud department are pretty nice.
Except hopefully not to the people who are committing fraud.
I had to send an email to my real estate agent in NY to tell her that this card had been cancelled, because its number was on an application form, and it's difficult enough to get approved for an apartment in NY without giving them your firstborn child (which I could've done since she was there with me, looking at it!) ..... all I needed was for them to see my credit card rejected!
Hopefully that will be averted now.
I then looked around the family room, saw the boxes, saw the packages, saw the catalogs, saw the laundry on the sofa ..... and made a decision.
I folded Son #3's laundry.
I am SO nice.
Incidentally, it's still sitting there, on the sofa, mocking me. He's walked past it at least 6 times since he got home from work and hasn't said a word about it.
Motherhood ....... such a boost for the ego.
If you're still reading this (and I doubt that many of you are) you'll be glad to know that after that I went through all of the packages, organized everything and then got it all put away.
All in all, that little job only took me about ...... oh, 4 or 5 hours, but hey, I got it done.
I warned you that it was a terrifying story. I should know ...... I live with this brain every day.
I'm not at all sure that I ever made it to the bathroom.
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