an afternoon soul search

5 years ago

Ordinary riches can be stolen; real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you. 
-Oscar Wilde

I was watching a history channel special on the soul the other day. Such an intense subject and nothing like grazing the surface of a topic that has made philosophers and scientists mutually crazy with discussion and theories over many years. But here I was, Aimee, just sitting here in front of a TV delving into my inner consciousness about a subject that I am passionately curious about. With the kids running around still energetic and playing with their new Christmas toys, and a half done grocery list in front of me, I sat there and wondered on this particular afternoon: what is my soul?

Is it the mental capacity I have for dimentional analysis?
Is it my appreciation of Bach and Chopin?
Is my fondness of chocolate wine?
Is it my negative association with spandex?
Is it relentless?
Is it passive?
Is it perceptive?
Is it muted?
Is it annoyed by slow drivers?

I know these may be silly questions, but how do we know it isn't involved in every single task that we involve ourselves with? We may just think of our soul when we are in a sermon at church, or after a tragedy forces us to define our beliefs as a coping mechanism. But seriously, it is so much more than at those times. And we know it. But is it the shadow and my automatic pilot is in the spotlight? I do not think so. At least that is what I believe.

When I look my kids, I know that I see them with my soul. It's deep.

Sometimes when I'm out on a sunny day I feel the sun's warmth and energy far past my superficial skin. It's deep.

If I hear a moving story or connect with an experience I get goosebumps. It's deep.

Maybe, just maybe we are more intertwined with our souls than we realize. I imagine that mine never sleeps. Instead she is there, sometimes more below the surface than others, but there all the same. I think that we choose how involved we let our souls be, but it is always the inner voice. Our North Star. Our guiding compass. It's our Jiminy Cricket.

And I don't know, there's just something extremely comforting in that. I'm going to work on the megaphone for my soul.

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