Lately I am realizing that I am often feeling as if I always seem to have something, and usually many things, to do….sound familiar? I go about my daily life in a pretty relaxed manner but recognize that I often seem to be spending more time taking care of those “to do” things than the things that I really want to be doing or love to be doing.
I am growing more and more uncomfortable with this situation and that is a great catalyst for changing something, but at the same time I am experiencing a powerful lesson in self acceptance and patience allowing this to be just the way things are for right now.
I also acknowledge that I do have a lot on my plate, as many of us do today…
I recently began taking new clients for coaching (one of those things from my “I love to do” list) and have even taken an office here in Santa Fe.
I also have a non-profit project on sustainable living that has taken a good amount of my time over the last year or so.
And I recently, recently as in since 2011 began… have started my very first art project, probably since I was in elementary school. I don’t remember if I had art in junior high school (and that was decades before all of the recent budget cuts) but it was never something that I felt confident doing.
On top of this over the last two and half years I have pretty much created an entirely new life returning to the U.S. after living in Europe for a number of years where I had a holistic center. When I came back to the states I chose to return to a new city (I had lived here only briefly in the past, but always loved it and felt drawn to be here) and I have been so fortunate to create an amazing community of friends and new family here in my adopted city, in spite of the fact that I have been traveling as much as I have been at home.
In effect on the outside an entirely new life exists, but I must say that the greatest journey has been the inner transformation that has been taking place for some years now…and this comes with me wherever I may travel or live.
I am sure that this is why I can see through the busy-ness that is a part of my life today. Often we have times when this is more pronounced, but when we bring our consciousness to it we can transmute each thing that we do, regardless of how mundane, to something that provides an opportunity for inner growth or awareness, or whatever you choose to call it.
I do not mean to imply that we need something, or we need to change something but in the sense of expansion or greatness, being able to recognize the beauty that surrounds us…even in the face of the horrendous.
To me this is truly a gift to live life in this way
Sometimes we also just need to give ourselves a break. That break can be from giving ourselves a hard time for what we have not done or not completed and sometimes we just have to stop. And I mean really STOP.
Right now, just stop for a moment. Sit back and take a deep breath and become aware of what is around you.
What do you smell?
What do you hear?
What kind of taste is in your mouth?
Try to linger in this place for a few minutes and experience returning to who you really are…in addition to all of the you’s that you live each day.
When we can bring our full awareness to whatever we are doing (even if the doing is stopping what he had been doing) it becomes so much richer. Even the laundry and washing dishes give us something in return….ourselves, when we do them being really present.
So as I venture more deeply into this new year I am filled with excitement and more of a sense of myself than ever before. I may have a lot to do but it all is so wonderful and rich when I remain grounded in myself doing them.
I may have preferences of what I would like to do. Would I rather go for a walk along the stream, under the beautiful blue sky and see the snow on the ground or go do some errands?
I would love that walk, but at the same time I know that doing the errands will take care of so many things so that when I do take that walk I will be more free than if I took it right now. I might take a walk around the block while doing my errands just to experience the day in a fuller way than just in and out of my car at each stop that I have to make. There is no reason for deprivation at the price of getting things accomplished.
This is one area that I have so enjoyed learning and experiencing… and that is the power of allowing myself to take a break, whether it is five minutes to sit back and experience my senses and myself, to take a short walk or a special, very conscious and present cup of tea or coffee. These small actions bring me back to myself and to the moment and then I really can experience the fullness of life whether it is while I run errands, return phone calls, take a bath or do my work.
Most of the time the gift of life is all around us, if we are willing and able to receive it.
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