(If you can't learn to laugh at yourself don't continue)
As a child I was considered an early developer, my breasts had practically filled a C cup by the time I entered middle school, and I had justturned the age of 13..on top of that, I had recieved my first period by the age of 10. Can you imagine just the horrors and confusion I went through during those times? Gym class was a disaster, especially when we were required to change infront of other girls into our uniforms and shower. I beleive that's when I started to realise I wasn't like the other girls at all. Some of the girls my age at the time didn't even wear bras!
Remembering my first day of P.E. is quite awful. As soon as I removed my clothes to change into my uniform the room would slowly became silent, and I would look up and see their face turning away in embarassment 'what is everyone staring at?'-
(I would like to let you know, I was a very dense and oblivious as a child)
And of course, it you're 'different' in school you will normally get picked on. It is sad reality of society, but I assume bullying is now a simple cruel right of passage.
It took a couple days until the bullying started to take it's course, and of course it started with the stares. Snide comments from the boys in class would start; the evil 'bitch' glares from my fellow female classmates, toilet paper thrown at me while they yelled "Stuffer!".
My first year of middle school I failed gym class becuase I faked my mother's handwriting to write excuses to skip. I dreaded Wednesday because every Wednesday was 'Jog 1 mile' day, literally..3 laps around the course. Throughout the year, my Mile times would start increasing. (Which is bad, becuase the more time you add the more time it took you to finish the mile) I started with ending my mile run in 10 minutes..and than it kept increasing by 1 minute..and another ...until the time I would finish my running my mile would almost be 20 minutes.
The reason why? Becuase we all know what happens to girls with a heavy chest wwhe they run. I was always being stared at by the boys in the other P.E classes (Our P.E. classes were split up by gender). They would make rude gesters rreffering to my chest. And while I ran I had to hold my chest to help make them stop bouncing, but I beleive holding them while you run, makes you look more obvious than you want it to. That kind of attention I didn't want, at all. My P.E instructor gave me an option, to pass, I had to type an entire report on Volleyball...I am talking pages worth, how much can you write about when it comes to a ball? It was the most painful subject I had ever had to write about...ever.
Over the years, it took me a long time to love myself, and I am sill learning to love myself, with some help of my husband.
It's very sad, but I got used to the comments, stares and glances about my breasts. I now find it empowering, even though I consider my breasts a curse and a gift. Becuase any of you girls who know wmy pain, should know how blessed we are to be naturally enhanced without having to drop a couple thousand dollars to be with these tatas. And to the ladies who feel burdened to the point where they are paying thousands of dolars to get their lady parts reduced, you are beautiful no matter what size you are. And to the ladies ho are reading this who find themselves lacking, breast size is not everything. (If you really are concerned with size, you are more than welcome to have some of mine!).
I want to sympathize with all my ladies out there. Here is some emotional pain relation!
Don't get me started on jogging...
2. I'm just going to pretend you're looking up..
3. What's the point of putting a napkin in my lap when I go out to eat anymore?
I sware I wasn't saving it for later..honestly..
4. Bras NEVER fit
5. Wearing lowcut tops shouldn't make me feel so self conscious but....
You know it ;)
No seriously..you may not..
7. When you realise guys are only being nice to you becuase you're busty!
8. Boob sweat
9. Yes, I have knocked an entire bowl of tomato soup over with my girls...
I was wearing white.
10. When you go shopping with your friends and they suggest a shirt they think is cute with tons of ruffles in the front.
12. I would love to sleep on my stomach for once
13. Button ups
14. Yes I have cried in a fitting room before, silinetly
15. But hey, if I want to use them for the right attention, meh.why the hell not? :)
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