I'd have to say that 2012 has been one of my best years, and I know without a doubt that it's due to something that changed within me.
You've heard it before, and I'm going to say it again: ATTITUDE. Yes, it turns out, Attitude is Everything, and we ALL have the power to get there. Now don’t stop reading because you think you’ve heard it before…give me a chance to explain:
When life gave me lemons (ie: living so far away from the place and the people I love), I Made Lemonade. I Decided. I Took Control. I Took Action. I Took Risks. I DID SOMETHING. I started to blog and I took creative writing classes, and I started my website, West Coast Posse, and I submitted an essay that was accepted and will be included in a BOOK this year! Not only that, I'm writing my own book, and if I must, I will self-publish it this year. I started this book YEARS ago. It sat on my computer, it moved from computer to computer, but suddenly something switched inside of me, and I began actively pursuing ways to make it happen. And. It. Will. I will complete and publish, Bluebirds, the novel I know I was always meant to write, in 2013.
Now I'm a pretty determined chick, and I've done this before. When I couldn't get pregnant, I Took Control. I Took Action. I DID SOMETHING. When modern medicine failed me, I doggedly pursued and researched ways of improving my chances. I questioned. I changed. I adapted. I kept my goals of having a baby in my mind every waking moment, and I doggedly pursued my chosen path. The path that spoke to me in whispers. I was quiet, and I listened. I didn't allow anything to shake me. I kept at it, and kept at it, until I met success. After six long years and one miscarriage, GlutenNaziMom was born, and so was GlutenNaziKid. He'll turn ten years old in 2013. And in 2013, Gluten Nazi Mom, the website that I started four years ago, will actually become something.
I wanted to be a stay at home mom. It felt like the right thing to do, and I have loved it. Not every moment. But overall, there’s nothing better I could have possibly done with the last 9.75 years than to see two daughters through adolescence and to see each of them, in her own way, get married (both in the last quarter of) this past year, and to see one spectacular little boy successfully navigate fourth grade.
Being a SAHM has put a lot of pressure on my husband. It’s cost us financially, but so did me working and being unhappy in one unfulfilling job after another. I couldn’t see how to do both, but I’ve felt this niggling at the back of my mind that I was the key. I was the key to my family’s financial freedom; to my own sense of purpose and fulfillment. I’ve written my entire life, and it’s something I’ve gone back to again and again. But I lacked the confidence to test the waters before. They remain largely untested, but instead of ignoring the niggling, I’m listening. I’m listening to that little voice inside of me, who’s been telling me for years that this was something I needed to do. I’m not standing outside the fence, watching the merry-go-round of life happen to everyone else. I’m not being a victim of circumstances that brought us back home and unemployed, I’m USING everything that’s happened before, everything that I know, every person I’ve met along the way, and I’m putting all the pieces together to make something happen in 2013.
And I couldn’t have done it without each one of you. Without every positive comment that gave me wings, and every negative comment that made me try harder, I could never have kept striving, kept believing, kept writing. DOING SOMETHING, whether it elicits positive response or negative, is so very much better than living in a void, than doing absolutely nothing but waking up every morning and taking up space—than sucking the Light out of the Universe.
So I’m giving back. You bet your sweet bippy, I’m USING what I know and who I know, but at the same time, I’m promoting others. I’m sharing the love and the knowledge and the insight and the LIGHT and the belief that what I’ve learned in my forty-six years on this earth, and what you’ve learned in yours, can help others; can make life better and the future brighter for those who choose to Listen and to Take Action and to Start Something in their own little corner of the globe. What’s Your Calling?
I now know that for each of us, We Are the Key. Inside every one of us lies the power to stop complaining and stop sniveling and stop spreading doom and destruction and misery; to stop passing blame, but rather, to use everything we know to share and to inspire and to make THIS the year everything turns around. Fiscal Cliff, be damned! I’m not holding my breath and waiting for the government to fix my existence. I’m going out there and making it happen for myself, for my family, and for anyone who wants to Decide—who wants to Choose—who wants to Take Action and come along. If we each look inside and make it Our Responsibility and Our Purpose, and spread that Attitude and Intention to our neighbors and around our blocks and around our towns and around Our Nation and maybe even the WORLD—we Each Have the Power to Make 2013 The Best Year We’ve Ever Known!
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