15 Ways My iPhone is Like a Third Child

3 years ago

It’s always there. It always has something to say. It can consume time like nothing else in my life. Nope, it’s not my toddler. It’s even not my preschooler. It’s my iPhone. As sad as it is, it’s a constant part of my daily life. One that is actually with me more hours a day than my two children are.

The more and more I rely on this piece of technology simply to function in the digital world I engrossed myself in, the more I realize how much this phone is like my 3rd child.

1. I never leave it home alone.

2. I have a mini-heart attack if I can’t find it for 5 minutes…okay 30 seconds.

3. I protect it from falls, bumps, and bruises.

4. I must take an occasional break from it to maintain my sanity.

5. Sometimes I’m up with it in the middle of the night, causing me to be tired the next day.

6. I get excited when it has news for me.

7. Occasionally I ignore it when it’s trying to get my attention.

8. It often is germ-infested and smears unsanitariness on my face.

9. It costs a lot of money to update, improve, and expand its capabilities.

10. It did not come with an instruction book. Learning how to manage it and integrate it into my life has been a process of trial-and-error since Day 1.

11. Occasionally it has a meltdown and I must walk away while it rights itself and is manageable again.

12. It sometimes pulls me away from conversations, games, and dinner parties I want to be at.

13. Sometimes I use it as an excuse to leave conversations, games, and dinner parties I don’t want to be at.

14. It has been known – as embarrassing as it is to admit – to get in the way of intimacy with my husband.

15. It’s always by my side, giving me the nagging feeling that it needs tending to.

So even though I opted to stop having children after my second was born, I accidentally had a 3rd child on my birthday in 2010, the day I got my first iPhone.

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