1. Consider including children from a previous marriage in your bridal party as bridesmaids, attendants, junior attendants, ushers, flower girl or ring bearer. Children may also like to do a reading during the ceremony, or even escort the bride (their mother) down the aisle. However, remember that often small children (under the age of five) become distracted easily and notoriously have small attention spans during the boredom of dry clerical recitations. Larry James has a very special "Blended Family Ceremony for Step-Children," a ceremony that includes the stepchildren in the ceremony in a very loving way. Another idea is to use the Blending of the Sand Ceremony (See Ceremony #2) and include the children.

2. To avoid feeling overwhelmed, send out thank you notes as you receive gifts before your wedding. This is especially important for givers who send their gifts in the mail or by other shipping methods. A thank you note assures the person that their gift reached you. For gifts received during or after your wedding day, thank you notes should be sent out within one to two months. Since the task may seem daunting, try to set aside 15 or 30 minutes everyday to work on them until you're finished.

3. It's tradition to raise your glass and toast the newlyweds at the reception. Don't leave your non-drinkers high and dry. There are a variety of sparkling beverages that make splendid champagne alternatives such as sparkling ciders and juices. Offer a selection of fruit nectars and juices, sparkling cider, punch, sodas or cappucinos. Toasting with a class of water, tea or coffee doesn't work.

Try one of these tantalizing cocktails: Ginger Cider Fuzz (a mix of cider, apricot nectar, club soda and ginger) or Sparkling Apple-Grape Punch (a mix of sparkling apple-grape, nectar and chunks of fresh fruit).

4. Have real, live butterflies or white doves released around you as you step out of the church, creating a true fairy tale effect. Your guests will never forget it! Neither will you. Check your local yellow pages for companies offering this service in your area.

5. Create a very special CD with all the songs that are special to you and your partner or that are played at the reception and present it your guests. Purchase vinyl CD sleeves and make your own covers. Include pictures of you and your partner with your names and date and place of the wedding. On the inside, include a list of the songs and on the back write a brief "thank you" note or poem. Cost: approx. $1.50 each if you make them yourself.

6. Instead, of a traditional guest book at your wedding, consider enlarging an engagement photo and setting it in a wide matte. There should be pens close by, so your guests can sign around the picture on the matte. Once framed you will be able to frame it and see it forever! Another idea would be to have someone designated to take a Poloraid picture of each guest as they enter. Have them sign the back of the picture with their name and address, then place them in a photo album.

7. Sitting at a table near people you don't know, waiting for the reception to officially begin, the food to be served, etc., can be awkward. Give your guests something to look at. Designate a computer-savvy friend to create a "Romantic Pictorial" for a presentation on a large screen during the reception. Use baby pictures, pictures when you met, fun times together, funny pictures, goofy pictures and if your friend can take some pictures during the wedding with a digital camera, use pictures of the wedding. You might consider including wedding pictures of both of the parents. Ask him to add some text to the pictures for the benefit of those who do not know the parents.

8. After the newlyweds have had their first dance at the reception, have the DJ play some appropriate music while the bride and groom head a conga line in which they go around the room and "pick up" all of their guests. The "hokie-pokie" might work too. This is a great way to break the ice and get everyone onto the dance floor!

9. If you are sentimental about your bouquet, consider having a second throw-away bouquet made for tossing. You can then get your bouquet preserved after the wedding and keep it forever.

10. When ordering services for your wedding and reception, make sure you get all the details "in writing!" No matter how small the detail, make sure it is in your contract. There is nothing worse then expecting something to be a certain way and finding out at the last minute that you have to pay extra for it or that it is unavailable on your special day. It's just good business.

11. On a super-tight budget? If you require a tent for an outdoor wedding, ask a local car dealership to rent one of their tents instead of paying lots of money from someone that specializes in tent rental. They will often donate it for the day if you agreed to mention the dealership in your programs.

12. Be prepared for a "quick fix." Bring needles, mini scissors & thread in the color of your dress and your bridesmaid's dresses. Also bring extra lipstick, pins, safety pins, sewing kits, dental floss, chap stick, clear nail polish, Band-Aids, Advil, Kleenex, hair spray, smelling salt, comb & brush, deodorant, perfume, Visine, barrettes & bobby pins, bottled water, crazy glue, toothpicks and anything else you think you might need. A drinking straw for the bride will keep her from messing up her lipstick and chalk to mark out any flaws on her wedding gown are nice extras. Also remember to bring an extra copy of contacts and phone numbers of all wedding day vendors. Check out our "Beauty Bag" checklist.

13. Planning on leaving the country for a very special wedding. How about your family and friends? When you return, plan a second ceremony so they can experience your wedding vows.

14. To keep the little people busy during the reception, have crayons, coloring books, books, paper, and a few toys available.

15. If the idea of assigning numbered tables at the reception seems impersonal, give the tables names relating to love. Arranged in alphabetical order to assure that there is still a navigable organization so the guests can find their seats. Here are a few words of love to consider: Happiness, Serenity, Bliss, Joyful, Amour, Adoration, Tranquility, Harmony, Delight, Heavenly, Enchantment, Cherish, Lovely, Memories, Inspiration, Romance, Forever, Eternity, Unity, Pleasure, Charm, Believe, Dreams, Fortune, Passion, Genuine, Priceless, and Desire. A thesaurus comes in handy when trying to elaborate on your list!